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Chapter Seven
Felicity should not have offered her hand to the duke. She knew it was a mistake almost immediately. The surprise written on his face was enough to tell her that, before the shivery sensation had hit her senses when she began to process all the conflicting feelings that almost overwhelmed her.
His hand was warm and rough and so much larger than hers. And yet, he held hers as though it were a delicate, fragile thing, being careful not to crush her thin bones despite her effort to offer him a firm shake. His were not the hands of an idle man. They actually put Felicity in mind of one of their grooms back at Glendale. The one who had taught her to ride when her father had been too busy trying to control the older girls and their mounts. A lump formed in her throat at the memory, adding to the sensory overload of the moment.
She had never been that close with a gentleman she wasn’t dancing with. And a proper young lady would never dance without gloves. Not that she had really had that much opportunity to dance or even be around many gentlemen other than members of her family, as she had insisted on waiting before making her debut. Now she was nineteen years old and touching a man’s bare hand for the first time. And it was going to detach her brain.
“Well,” she began, wondering what to do with her hand now that it was in his possession. She wanted to snatch it back but didn’t want to be rude. “I ought to go check on Adelina,” she continued, giving his hand one final firm shake before letting it go.
“Yes, of course,” he agreed, very quickly to Felicity’s ears as she was agonizing over her embarrassment.
With barely a backward glance, she fled the room.
Felicity did as she had said she would and went in search of Adelina. Spending the rest of her evening in the child’s company kept at least part of her mind occupied, but part of her remained behind in the dining room analyzing every word that had been said.
Dearest Gracie,
I shook the Man’s hand and now I can’t get it out of my mind. I am the most ridiculous nitwit ever born. I should have listened to all your warnings. But I do not regret this start of mine in the least. I just have to wonder why the Man seems so very suspicious of everything. Perhaps it is just his position in life that causes it. But Father was never like that.
Felicity always made an effort to include as few identifying facts as possible in her letters, even the ones she only composed in her mind. Her sister would know what she was talking about.
Are you absolutely certain no one has yet suspected? I knew I wanted to do this, but I’m beginning to suspect that I expected to be caught before now. It’s hard to believe no one has noticed my absence in two months. I guess I knew what I was about when I laid my plans. But I’m fairly certain it is only the fact that everyone is preoccupied with their own affairs that has allowed me to get away with this.
How is little Augustus?
Finally, Felicity admonished herself as she dragged her attention back to the present. It was no use turning into a moonling over the handsome duke. She had already made choices in her life that put the possibility of a noble match far out of reach. She was at Rathnelly to care for Adelina and to forge a life for herself that was far different from what was expected of an earl’s daughter. But she had no wish to court scandal for herself or her family. She could not allow herself to grow attached to His Grace, she told herself firmly even as she was tucking in her young companion.
It was a challenge for her to convince her troubled thoughts of that, though, and it was a turbulent night, seemingly cut very short by Adelina’s arrival in her room the next morning.
“Are you still abed, Jonesy? You’re never a slugabed. Are you ill?” the child inquired with gleeful enthusiasm, causing Felicity to laugh despite her itchy eyes.
“I’m not ill, merely tired.”
“But why are you tired? Didn’t you go to bed right after me last night?” The child looked around even as she bounced on Felicity’s bed. “Were you reading in bed?” she asked, marvelling at the thought before she wrinkled her nose over the title she spied. “You were reading Debrett’s?” she asked, incredulous. “That should have put you straight to sleep, not kept you up.”
Felicity laughed and sat up in the bed.
“Don’t be monstrous, Adelina. I haven’t the energy for your fidgets until I’ve had my chocolate. I don’t know why it isn’t here yet.”
Right on cue, there was a scratch at the door. Adelina flung herself toward it in her enthusiasm to be of use.
“Good morning, Matilda. Thank you, so much,” Felicity greeted the bearer of her breakfast. “I thought you might have forgotten me this morning.”
“Not at all, Miss,” the girl replied with a grin and a small curtsy. “I was by earlier to stoke your fire, but you just looked so peaceful like that I couldn’t bear to wake you. Mrs. Betts said as we were to let you sleep a little longer.”
Felicity was embarrassed at the thought of the servants being concerned for her. Not that she didn’t expect it, of course, but now that she was employed herself, she hated the thought of inconveniencing the other servants.
“Thank you, Matilda, and please, tell Mrs. Betts my thanks as well. I’m sorry to have put you out, but I do appreciate it. I needed just a little more shut eye this morning it seems.”
“It wasn’t any trouble at all, Miss, I promise you that.” The maid bustled around the room a little before taking her leave.
Felicity propped herself up against the headboard and determined to enjoy her breakfast, even if it was in the energetic company of Lady Adelina. The child’s stare was a trifle unnerving, but Felicity appreciated her efforts to not disturb her. After a couple of sips of the hot drink, she finally took a deep breath and slowly allowed it to escape before turning her own stare upon her companion.
“Very well, my lady, I’m much restored. Now tell me, what shall we do today?”
“We need to ask Father when my brothers aim to turn up, for one thing, and then we need to start planning the festivities you mentioned last night.”
“That’s right, I did mention festivities, didn’t I?” Felicity repeated, stalling for time. “To be perfectly honest, though, my lady, I haven’t the first idea of what we ought to plan. I have no experience with boys, especially not of the age of your brothers.” She took a bite of her toast to stall for a little bit more time.
