Page 62 of Definitely Not Him


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“Thank you for throwing me that red flag. I’ll be sure to keep it.” I handed him an updated copy of the list I’d given him the other day. “I was actually hoping we could discuss dating other people.”

“Come again?”

“You were about to propose to someone else a week or so before you came here,” I said, swallowing. “You were on a date with her before you slept with me.”

“I’ve never taken that woman on a real date.”

“But you slept with her?”

“Never.”

“She’s giving a lot of interviews that imply otherwise.”

“Then you should stop watching them.”

I shook my head. “Whatever it was, you clearly aren’t over her, and I want to date someone who is emotionally available, someone who won’t care about a one-night mistake.”

“You can date whoever the hell you want, after you have my baby.” He paused. “Babies.”

“Okay, let me reword what I’m trying to say.” I kept my voice firm. “I’m about to date other people whether you like it or not.”

“Then allow me to reiterate what I made plainly clear. You’re not fucking anyone else for the next six to seven months.”

“How do you plan on stopping me?” I asked. “Are you planning to hire a private cock-blocker?”

“Don’t tempt me to look into it,” he said. “If you want someone to fuck you because your ‘hormones are out of control’ and you need to ‘one-up your vibrator collection’ you could just tell me. I’ll happily handle it, I promise.”

I gasped. “You were listening to me during my lunch break the other day?”

“You were standing in the bathroom, and you were as loud as ever with your friend,” he said. “Not as loud as you were on the night in your flat with me, but your words were very clear.”

I stared at him.

“Don’t worry,” he said. “No one else was here but me, since you take your lunch breaks at night like I do. As I was saying though, we should revisit the subject.”

“You’re willing to make a no-strings-attached arrangement with me just for sex, then?”

“Yes.” He smiled. “Absolutely.”

“In that case, I’ll sleep on it, dip my feet in the dating pool while I’m away at next week’s book fair, and let you know if I’m ever ready to discuss that with you. If not, we’ll discuss how we want to co-parent next. Anything else you want to talk about?”

He looked stunned at the sudden whiplash.

“Guess not.” I shrugged and walked out of the door. “Have a wonderful weekend.”

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