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“I was so worried about you. You look well, though. You’re so brave.”
I smile at her. In my mirror this morning, my complexion was grey and my eyes were dull and tired. “I look like crap. But thank you.”
“How’s your poor Dad? He must be devastated.”
The smile freezes on my face. I’m saved from answering by crossing the threshold into the classroom where our teacher is already waiting.
I can barely follow the discussion around me aboutHamletafter missing so many lessons, and my head feels jammed with fog. It’s like that in all my morning classes, but I suppose the teachers have decided to go easy on me, seeing as no one chews me out for staring vacantly out the windows.
In between classes I feel the intrusive stares of my classmates, and some of the bolder ones ask blunt questions. Everyone’s interested in Mom’s unsolved murder, and mumbled sympathies quickly become excuses to probe me for information about the investigation. I hear the phraseBlack Orchid Murderswhispered behind my back more than once. I mutter that I don’t know what’s happening with the investigation over and over until Nicole sees everyone off.
“What do you know about the Black Orchid Murders?” I ask Nicole as we sit together at lunch.
She scrunches up her face and thinks. “Nothing, really, except they were really gruesome and no one knows who did it. Four girls were killed, and no one knows why. I heard Mom and Dad mention the case the other night. Has it got something to do with your mom?”
I shake my head. “It keeps coming up and I don’t know why.”
I can’t bring myself to search for it online in case I see some horrible crime scene photos or read something that reminds me of what happened on my birthday. I see enough blood and brutality every time I close my eyes.
Nicole chews her lower lip for a moment, and then she drops her voice to a whisper. “Did you really see nothing that night?”
My heart starts to pound. What if I slip up and reveal the truth, and someone else ends up dead because of me?
Nicole mistakes my paralyzed silence as grief. She grabs my hand. “I’m sorry, I’m so insensitive. Forget I asked. You’ve been through enough.”
“I’m okay. I’m still…processing everything and trying not to think about that night too much. Meanwhile, Dad’s got a plan.”
Nicole smiles. “Your Dad always has a plan. I’m glad he’s still mayor. Mom and Dad have been worried about him ever since he gave that heartbreaking eulogy.”
Yes, didn’t he seem devastated.
Nicole opens her sandwich, grimaces, and bites into it.
“He wants me to get married.” The words taste disgusting in my mouth.
Nicole stops chewing and her eyes grow round as golf balls. Then she swallows her whole mouthful at once and starts coughing. “Oh, my god. To who? But you’re seventeen. We’re inschool.”
I pound her on the back as I try and decide how much to say. Nicole’s been my best friend since we were in kindergarten. I can’t tell her why, but I have to confide in someone what is happening to me. “I can’t say yet. It’s complicated. I’m trying to talk Dad out of it but he—he—”
My eyes burn with tears and my throat feels thick.
Nicole takes a mouthful of soda and sits up, and her shock becomes understanding. “It’s okay. I get it. He’s worried about you. He wants to be sure that someone will take care of you if something happens to him.”
I suppose it’s only natural that Nicole would think that Dad’s acting nobly. So many people of Coldlake think of Dad as their hero.
“You’re not leaving school or anything, are you? You not getting married next week?”
“No. Nothing’s going to happen until I’m eighteen, and not then, either, if I can help it.”
“Oh, phew. It’s way too sudden for you to get married. Plus, it’s been horrible without you here for the last month. I’ve missed you so much.” She smiles crookedly at me.
“I’ve missed you, too.” I hug Nicole as tight as I can. “I’ll tell you everything as soon as I can. I promise.”
As I approach the exit at the end of the day, I see that there are two dozen or more girls clustered around the school gate. Their whispers spread like fire.
“He’s so hot.”
“Is that his car?”
