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“Not much. I made her think I hated her guts and wanted to get rid of her. Worked a treat.”
“I didn’ttrusthim,” I protest. “I believed him when he acted like he wanted nothing more than to see the back of me. I thought the hatred was mutual.”
“But what did you say to her to make her hate you so much?”
He shrugs. “Everything I could think of.”
Cassius cups my cheek and draws my face up to his. “What did he tell you,bambina?”
“It doesn’t matter. I just want to die, please. You’ve broken me. You’ve won.”
“Are a few of Scava’s nasty words all it takes to make you give up, after everything you’ve been through?”
Cassius doesn’t get it. If the only thing Lorenzo hurt me with was words then I could say a few of my own back. Words don’t hurt me.
Sick, twisted and depraved behavior, that’s what hurts me.Mybehavior. I had sex with that monster, and I liked it. That makes me an even bigger monster than him, and I should be put down like an animal.
“He handed Dad that knife so he could kill my mother, the only person I’ve ever loved. He used that knife on me, and then I…then…”
I can’t even say the words.
Cassius’ jaw clenches. He glares at Lorenzo, and then awkwardly pats my shoulder, his body rigid again. I can feel how much he detests comforting me like this. “Bambina, he was lying.”
“No, he wasn’t. I saw for myself the knife Dad used to kill Mom. When Lorenzo cut that chip out of my neck, he used his knife on me just to be cruel. He used it again today to cut my clothes off.”
Vinicius shoots Lorenzo a furious look. “You let her think that?”
Lorenzo forces a laugh. “What? I was trying to win a bet. You would have done the same.”
The room remains silent.
“Tell her the truth,” Cassius finally growls.
“Fine,” Lorenzo mutters, and looks at me. “I was flipping the knife over my knuckles and your father walked past me and grabbed it. Happy?”
“No, I’m not!” I cry. “Why didn’t you stop him?”
“Because it’s not my business if a man wants to kill his wife. And I didn’t use the knife to get the chip out of your neck. I used a scalpel, you just couldn’t see what I was doing.”
Anger burns through as I look at him. Maybe he didn’t hand Dad the knife, but he let me believe that he did and then hefucked me.
“She hates you. I can feel it,” Cassius says.
Lorenzo sighs impatiently. “I don’t give a damn.”
Vinicius is eyeing Cassius and me speculatively. “They’ll all hate Lorenzo no matter who we choose. There’s nothing we can do about that. At least Chiara’s attracted to him.”
“No, I’mnot. I’m never letting him touch me again. This afternoon was a disgusting, horrible mistake. You guys aren’t normal, making bets with each other about who gets someone’s virginity.”
“No kidding we’re not normal,” Vinicius shoots back. “And you’re lying to yourself if you think you can be normal after what you’ve been through.”
That’s not true, I think desperately. I’ve always been Chiara Romano, the mayor’s daughter, good in school and comfortable with everyone’s attention.Well-adjusted and conscientious, that’s what all my school report cards said. I clung desperately to this idea the whole year I was promised to Salvatore, and it was easy because most of the time, he just wasn’t there.
These three men remind me of my pain whenever I look at them.
Cassius brushes his thumb against my cheek, and I realize tears have slipped down my face.
“The four of us have been through things together,” Cassius says. “Painful, brutal things that bond you like nothing else. We need someone for us all to bond with. Someone at the heart of us.”
