Page 100 of They Never Tell


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“Bria’s gonna be okay. Carmen? Carmen is gonna have to get a job.”

“Oh, that’s for damn sure. I’ll give her a few days to get her bearings, but then I’m gonna sit her down and have a come-to-Jesus.”

Ladonna didn’t say it, but she wondered if he ever thought about the fact that they wouldn’t have been able to afford a divorce if Carmen was still in school. They would have been like one of those miserable separated couples who still share the same house.

“Let me know if you want me there,” Ladonna said. “We can double-team her.”

Marcus nodded and smiled. “Will do. Did you find a doctor for Bria?”

“Yeah, there’s a really good one about ten minutes from campus.” They’d all be driving her to Tuskegee at the end of the summer. It had been up in the air for months until Bria promised to continue her therapy.

“I have a question,” Marcus said. “Why the hell didn’t she tell us?”

“Kids never tell." She shook her head. It hurt to even think about it. "I didn’t tell my parents. I was embarrassed. And ashamed.”

“Jesus. Why would you feel like that?”

She shrugged. “I don’t know.”

She wondered how Nyleah felt. Was she ashamed? Did she even realize she was being preyed upon? As far as Ladonna could tell, Nyleah never told a soul. She was essentially a child dealing with it all on her own. And the worst part? Even after her death, there was no dignity. No protection. No justice. Only justifications.

Marcus jangled his keys in his hand as if to signal that it was time to clock out of this conversation. “Take care of yourself, Lady.”

“You, too.”

He turned to walk back toward his car, but he stopped when Ladonna spoke again. “Why were you there that night? You never told me.”

He turned around. “I drove down to the clubhouse and sat in my car. I didn’t tell you, because…you know I hate when you’re right." He chuckled. "You were so worried that night. And believe it or not, there were times when I took heed to stuff you said. I guess I just went down there to make sure everything was okay.”

“Sorry I infected you with my anxiety.”

He didn't seem to hear her. “I kept playing it back, like maybe I could have done something. Maybe if I went inside and checked things out, it might have made a difference.”

“There’s nothing you could have done, Marcus. Don’t blame yourself.”

"Maybe." He sighed. "Bria saw me that night, too. She was looking out the window. I waved to her…" he trailed off.

He didn’t say another word. He just nodded and walked to his car, and out of the life they both shared. There weren’t any papers served yet, but the connection had been severed just the same. She hoped they could keep things congenial for the sake of the girls. For the sake of themselves. They had been through some shit this year. They both deserved some peace. Him, most of all.

Thefootballfieldsparkledwith morning dew. Bria stepped out onto the track and felt a strong pang of sadness. And mixed in with that sadness was regret, and loss, and a longing to run far away from the past. It was an odd contradiction to her usual need to make things right.

“Aye girl,” called a voice behind her, and she whirled around to find Bakari behind her, all smiles. “You’re here kinda early, ain’t you?”

Graduation didn’t start for another four hours, so she could see why he asked that. But no, she wasn’t early for graduation. She didn’t plan on going to graduation. Too many painful memories. “I just came to say goodbye.”

“Bye to who?”

“Just…everything. This life.”

Bakari frowned. “Life?”

“Notmylife. High school, and everything that happened.”

“Gotcha. I feel you. It’s been a rough year.”

“Yeah. But something good came out of it. Congrats on Penn State.”

“Oh, you heard?”

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