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So many questions flood my brain, and when I don’t answer, he speaks up again. “I’m sorry that I seemed to have squashed your thunder. I didn’t mean to. You know my dad will help and guide you with whatever you have in mind. If you want his help, I mean.”
“Of course we would!” I blurt out.
He chuckles under his breath. “Here, I never thought my dad would be helping my girlfriend with anything.”
“That doesn’t bother you, does it?”
“Nah. I’m used to my father being kind of a spectacle in this town. I guess this isn’t really any different. I’ll ask him next time I go over there. I’m at my mom’s tonight.”
“I’d really appreciate the help,” I say, unsure of myself all of a sudden.
“You know I’d do anything for you. I can’t wait to hear you sing again. Can I come to the first practice?”
My eyes widen in fear.
The first practice?
The thought of having him watch as we work out all the kinks of playing together for the first time makes my stomach turn.
Here I am, feeling upset that he wasn’t overly thrilled for me, yet when he wants to be there to support me, I want to tell him no.
I’m a mess.
“Let us at least get one practice under our belt before we have an audience.” I pause, and when he doesn’t say anything, I continue, “I’m sure the first one won’t be too good, maybe even horrible.” I try to make him laugh, which, thankfully, he does.
“Okay, well, I want to be your first guest to watch. Deal?”
“Deal,” I say with a sigh, trying to force a grin.
I’ve been at every single one of his baseball games, even the far away games, where I’d travel with his mom alone since he was on the team bus. I should be elated that he wants to be there.
So, why does the thought of having him there make me so nervous?
“Hannah, dinner’s ready,” my mom calls from down the hall, and for the first time ever, I’m actually happy that I have a reason to get off the phone with Matthew.
“Sorry, I’ve got to go,” I say into the phone.
“Okay. Night.”
“Night.”
That’s also the first time we haven’t saidI’ll call you right backor made plans to hang out before we got off the phone. I feel like we just had our first fight, but it wasn’t a fight. It was just weird, and I don’t know what to think about it.
CHAPTEREIGHT
Hannah
Today is our first band practice, and I’m a mixture of emotions—from excited to nervous. Through our text messages, we decided to work on three songs: “Gunpowder & Lead” by Miranda Lambert, “Before He Cheats” by Carrie Underwood, and—even though I’m freaked out about trying to sing it—“Girl Crush” by Little Big Town. Once Trent suggested it, the other guys were fully on board, saying they wanted to test my abilities with ballad songs.
I don’t know why it makes me uneasy to sing a song like that, but it does. With the other songs, the band will be just as much of a focus as me, but with that song, one hundred percent of the focus will be on me with very little instrumental music in the background.
When I basically told Matthew he wasn’t invited to the practice, I wasn’t thinking about how I would actually get there since he seems to be my ride everywhere we go, but thankfully, Nate said he could swing by and pick me up before he headed out to Cole’s place.
He honks when he arrives at my house, and I’m quick to run out and hop in his truck.
“Thank you again for the ride.”
“No problem. But Matthew knows, right? Not looking to get my ass kicked by the baseball team for this,” he jokes.
