AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Aisha ran her hand along the back of Gabi’s head and drew her into a lingering kiss that challenged Gabi’s conscience. Aisha pushed her back against the wall and unbuttoned her jeans. Gabi should be sensible and object. They should take a slow walk back to the party and talk to different people and guard their feelings. Gabi should go home, adjust to the events of the evening, take in Nana’s delight and the repressed environment in which Aisha lived. It had been an odd night.
But Gabi couldn’t do that. She couldn’t just walk back to the party, not with this deep need. She wanted Aisha in a way she’d never wanted anyone. She kissed Aisha, tasted her, explored her with tenderness and whispered a groan as Aisha discovered her wetness. She struggled to support her own weight as Aisha slipped her fingers deep inside her and moved with the gentle rhythm of a lazy tide. She peaked too soon and was left feeling empty. Illicit moments behind an animal feed shed would never be enough, and she didn’t want to hide her love. She wanted to fall asleep with Aisha in her arms and wake her with kisses. She wanted to see the world with her. She loved her, and anything other than being together would break Gabi’s heart.
“Your mama is suspicious,” Gabi said as they made their way slowly back across the field.
“She’s nosy,” Aisha said.
Aisha touched Gabi’s hand and Gabi pulled away. Aisha was drunk and behaving like she didn’t care when Gabi knew she did. “We have to be careful. Someone could see us.”
“Not this far out, they won’t,” Aisha said, and linked arms with Gabi and tugged her close.
They ambled in silence, Gabi’s frustration growing as she mulled over the hopelessness of their situation. Sacromonte was like stepping back in time a hundred years. “What are we going to do?” she asked.
“Run away,” Aisha said and laughed.
Gabi slid her hand down Aisha’s back. “That would be a bit extreme.”
Aisha stopped walking. “Would you?”
“Run away with you?”
Gabi nodded, though her stomach tightened. “If that’s what you want to do,” she said, though she hadn’t sounded convincing.
She looked towards the lights where the party was in full swing, to where her Nana had been reunited with the love of her life. They had looked like they belonged together, even after all the years that had passed. She had no idea what Nana might plan to do now, but leaving Nana tugged at her heart. Aisha’s papa, Nicolás, and Conchita had looked at Gabi as if she were something they might scrape off their shoes after working in the field, and it didn’t take much to imagine their concerns would grow with any length of time that she and Aisha spent together. What she knew was that she was in love with Aisha and wanted to live a normal life with her, and that would never be possible in Sacromonte. The scenario was loaded with unanswered questions and had the potential to deliver heartache and suffering. There was nothing simple about the option of running away.
“Why do you hesitate?”
Gabi’s mind lingered on one question, and it took all her resolve to control the swell of emotion that backed her thought. “What would you do if we left and then at some point, broke up?”
Aisha shook her head. “I love you. I don’t want to be with anyone else.”
“I know. That’s why I’m asking.”
Aisha held her head in her hand. “Why do you talk of breaking up?”
“Because I’m not good at relationships. And I would feel responsible for making you consider a decision that would take you away from your family.”
Aisha stumbled as she tried to maintain her balance. “I’ve never been attracted to men, Gabi. I’ve never been with a woman because that isn’t an option for me. I’m breaking our laws because I have to follow my heart.” She pinched the bridge of her nose and when she looked at Gabi, the moonlight revealed her wet cheeks. “I would never ask you if I wasn’t clear about how I feel. I can’t carry on living in a community that won’t respect who I am. What we share is more than I ever imagined it could be. It scares me, but I don’t think of us breaking up. I think of being together. I deserve to be happy, and I am when I’m with you.”
“And if us being together means that you lose your family?”
Aisha shook her head and wiped her cheeks. She turned away and took two paces, turned back, and took another two paces. “I love them so much.”
Gabi lowered her head and kicked at the dirt. Was Aisha ready to leave her family and give up everything she had just for her? And if Aisha didn’t settle once they’d left and realised she’d made a mistake, it would have destroyed everything good in Aisha’s life. It would destroy them. Maybe Gabi was scared. Maybe she wasn’t ready. “You don’t know what being in a relationship is like, let alone with someone like me.”
Aisha shook her head. “Please don’t do that, Gabi.”
Gabi looked away. “What?”
“Don’t tell me who to love. I have had enough of being told who and what is right for me. I don’t need it from you too.”
Gabi’s stomach lurched. She pulled Aisha into her arms. “I’m sorry,” Gabi whispered. The reassuring warmth of Aisha and the scent of their love making turned Gabi’s thoughts upside down and turned her insides out. Fear did strange things, she thought—love did too. How could she walk away and leave Aisha with these people who called themselves family? But there was something else to consider. If they ran away together now, how would that impact Nana and Juan? Gabi’s stomach twisted as alarming thoughts pinged loudly.
Aisha eased away from Gabi and stared at her. The tears had dried, and she looked as if she’d suddenly sobered up. “Why do you think so little of yourself?”
The blow winded Gabi. Aisha was right. She had always thought more of her girlfriends than she had of herself. Her first proper girlfriend, Lillian, had ended their relationship because she’d said Gabi was needy. And although Gabi had thought the comment strange, it had screwed with her head. She’d gone into the next relationship trying not to be that person and was accused of not caring. In truth, Karin had been a rebound mistake after Lillian. Finally, there was Shay, and she’d been so far up her own arse, she didn’t see Gabi as anything other than someone who provided a bed for the night, and it was an easy way to avoid paying rent. The bottom line was Gabi thought she was lousy at relationships, and she’d got enough evidence to prove it. “I get needy when I love someone,” she said.
Aisha frowned. “What does that mean?”
