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I can’t get swept up by her and her pain.
“Fuck, Little Dove.” I pull back and rest my forehead against hers. Her eyes remain closed as I stare down at her. Both our chests heave as we try to catch our breaths. “Hadley look at me,” I demand.
She tries to turn her face away, but I’m not having it. I might be addicted to her defiance, but now isn’t the time for it to show its face.
“Please,” I breathe, softer this time.
Her eyelashes flicker before her green depths appear before me. They’re dark, tired, and full of the shadows that haunt her.
“I’m so sorry.”
She shakes her head.
“Thank you for telling me.”
Hadley pushes her palm to my chest, forcing me to back up. I move aside and allow her to sit. She wraps her arms around herself and stares out toward the ocean.
“I hadn’t even accepted it before they’d shipped me here. I was just meant to restart my life without anyone, and as if nothing ever happened.
“I was broken, Cole. Totally fucking shattered, and they just turned their backs on me.”
Shifting closer, I wrap my arm around her shoulder and pull her closer to me, hoping that she can find some kind of support in my touch.
She blows out a long, shaky breath. “They’ll never accept me again. Me, us. Any of it.”
“You don’t need people like that in your life, Dove.”
“Maybe not, but who else do I have? My life has just been turned on its head once more, and I have no one to turn to.”
“You have… us. You’ve got us, Dove. I know it might not mean like much. We don’t exactly have a lot to offer, but we’re here.”
“Are you, though?” she asks, looking at me for the first time since I sat up. “Are you here? With me? Or are you running scared?”
“I’m… Fuck.”
/> I drop my head, desperately trying to come up with the words she deserves to hear from me but as always, failing miserably.
“I told you that I loved you, Cole, and you turned your back on me, just like they did. All you need to do next is tell me to get rid of—”
“No,” I snap. “No, don’t. Don’t even say it,” I say in a rush.
Reaching out, I tuck a loose lock of her hair behind her ear.
“Y-you… you want this?” she asks, her brows pulled together like she can’t even believe the words she’s saying, let alone that I might agree with them.
“I’m a mess, Hadley. I don’t need to tell you that. You’ve witnessed it firsthand time and time again.” I clench my fists as images from my past flash through my mind.
“You’re not the only one who was let down by their parents. Our stories may be different, but they both ended with two broken people who don’t know which way is up.
“The thought of looking after you terrifies me, but another, someone so vulnerable and dependent… fuck, Hads.”
“I know,” she says, reaching out and wrapping her small, warm hand around my tight fist. Her touch instantly relaxes me, and I blow out a breath.
“I lied to you.”
“I know,” she says simply. “I’ve never needed your words, Cole. I see more than you think I do. It’s why I pushed you.”
“Shit. No one else has ever…” I trail off, not all that confident with this emotional conversation.
