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“Yeah, me too.”
“You know, he said some things earlier. Things that maybe, deep down, I always knew but didn’t want to believe.”
“About when he was younger?” I ask, my heart breaking all over again.
“Yeah.” Conner runs a hand down his face. “Fuck, what if... he should hate us. We left him there, with our junkie mother and her revolving door of deadbeat Johns.”
“It’s not your fault.”
“Isn’t it?” Pain etches into every line of his face. “If something did happen, and fuck, I think it did, then we left him there... we....”
“You were only kids, Conner.” I reach across the counter and cover his hand with mine.
“I’m his twin. I should’ve known. But Cole was this sickly, quiet kid, I just thought...” He blanches.
“You need to talk. All of you. When Cole is better and out of the hospital, you need to sit down as a family and talk.”
“Yeah... you’re right. But what if he—”
The desperation in his voice makes my heart clench. “Cole loves you, Conner,” I say. “But he’s in pain. It’s why he needs control.”
“I’ll fix this.” His jaw clenches, and I offer him a sad smile.
“I don’t think it works like that, Con. Cole doesn’t need you to fix anything, he just needs you to be there when he’s ready to fix himself.”
Realization dawns in his eyes. “Yeah, I can do that.”
“Good.”
Because something tells me Cole is going to need all the help he can get.
Whether he wants it or not.
The next day, I go back to school. I can’t sit in my dorm room dwelling on everything, and I know I need to respect Cole’s wishes to stay away from the hospital. No matter how much it hurts.
People stare as I move through the halls and sit in class, trying to focus on anything but their curious gazes and incessant whispering. I don’t know what James told Principal Vager, but I catch the words “accident” and “recovering” in more than one hushed conversation.
At lunch, a couple of the girls from the squad try and ask me what happened, but I murmur some incoherent response and hurry away. I’ll never give up Cole’s secrets. Not to these people. People who are interested in scandal and gossip. They don’t care about Cole and his brothers. All they care about is what juicy story they can get their hands on next.
I’m heading to fourth period when Miss Jones collars me in the hall.
“Hadley, my office,” she says with a neutral expression. My heart sinks as I reluctantly follow her. If I don’t, she’ll only haul me in front of Vager, and I can do without that.
The second I enter the room, my worst fear is confirmed.
“Your father would like to talk to you.” She motions to the phone on her desk.
“I...”
“He’s concerned. We both are. Take the call, Hadley.” She gives me a pointed look, one that tells me I’m not escaping her office without at least hearing my father out.
“I’ll give you some privacy.”
“No,” I say. “You should stay.” She needs to hear this too.
Her brows knit together, but she stays, lingering by the door as I pick up the receiver. “Father,” I say.
“Is there something you’d like to tell me, Hadley?” His tone reflects the lack of emotion in mine.
