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The rest of the night went by like a dream. At one point, she even cried, and he kissed it off her cheek.
At one, he got up to leave. “Do you want coffee first?” she asked.
“I can’t ask you to make coffee after midnight.”
“Yes, you can.”
Pulling on a T-shirt and underpants, she was unashamed at last. She assumed he was working nights, but didn’t ask. She wouldn’t ask where Amber thought he was; since they were living together, Amber had to think he was working. He was an adult man. If he wanted to see her, he’d figure it out.
They made comfortable talk while he drank the coffee, like you would with a friend. Getting up, he stretched, and she looked at that body. He was so giving in bed; she shivered thinking of what he did to her, how it felt to have him slide inside her.
An affair might not work. She might get too jealous of Amber. But she’d manage for tonight.
He put the cup in the sink. “What’re your plans for the rest of the week?”
“I’m traveling Wednesday and Thursday. Friday, I go to New Orleans. Nothing unusual.”
“I have to have your phone number.”
“That’s kind of risky.”
“Right now, I don’t care.”
She gave it to him, watching him key it in, his hands shaking ever so slightly.
When he put the phone in his pocket, she did it again, wrapped her arms around his shoulders and kissed him like he was the first man she’d ever kissed. Kissing her back, he threaded his hands under her t-shirt, knowing being away from her was going to be torture. Then, totally out of character for Katrina, tears cruised down her cheeks. She didn’t emote; no sounds came out, just a stream of sadness.
“I’m so sorry. I wish I didn’t have to go.” Tipping her chin, he looked into her eyes. “This is really hard.”
Katrina didn’t ask why he had to leave. “I hope you’ll come back soon.”
Leading him to the back door, she kissed him a last time before he walked out to the garage. He pulled the car out without the lights on, just in case, although who were they fooling? And when he waved to her before pulling away, she cried for real.
***
The next morning, she awoke before sunrise in the throes of a depression so deep she wondered how she would get through the day alive. It wasn’t the betrayal. Guilt over betraying Alphé wasn’t even an issue. It was the hopelessness of being without Dave. Her phone beeped, and with glee she grabbed it, hoping it was Dave.But it was Alphé. Disappointed, she read his text. Just so you know, Calista and the kids came back here last night. Austin called her and threatened to harm her, so I called 9-1-1 like you were instructed to do, and they advised her to stay with friends.
Here was a twofold issue. Why didn’t Calista call Katrina to rescue her? Why Alphé? And that led to the reality that she’d been in sexual ecstasy probably at the exact time Calista would have needed her, so thank god no one came knocking on her door. Playing it up for all she was worth, she gushed, how wonderful that he could help her out, how awful it was for Calista to experience that, blah, blah, blah.
All she could think of was the need to get herself to church. Not for confession, but to figure out how she would survive this if Dave Chastain was never fully hers.
Pulling on yoga pants and a Stanford University T-shirt, she grabbed her phone and keys and headed out. Hopefully, Alphé had already come and gone, and she saw him drive off just as she arrived.
Feeling unusually emotional, she stopped at the votive stand first and lit candles, one for Alphé, four for his children, one for Maggie, one for Annie, and an additional one for Dave Chastain. There was that pesky tear again, and she brushed it away. The rosary would be just the thing she needed, and she pulled it out of the little hidden pocket in her yoga pants, made for house keys and coffee money, but the perfect place for beloved rosary beads that had belonged to her namesake grandmother, Katerina.
With the three small beads between her fingers, she prayed,Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou among women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb.Bowing her head, she cried. Beating her thigh with a fist, she shook her head.Stupid, stupid, stupid.
***
After his shower, Alphé joined Calista in the kitchen. She had coffee and eggs and toast ready for him.
“I can’t remember the last time I had a hot breakfast. You didn’t have to do this.”
“Yes, I did. You gave up your bed for me. How was the couch?”
“Fine! Just fine. Remember, the couch and I are old friends.”
“I guess we have a decision to make. Do I leave before Lola gets here?”
