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“I knowbefore you came to work for me that you had your daycare. After the babies are here, if you want to go back to that, I’ll support you.”
Carolina set down the cup of ice water she was sipping as she turned to look at me in surprise.
“I don’t want you to feel like I’m taking advantage of you.”
“It’s not taking advantage if I offer and if I want to take care of you. Your passion isn’t making organizational systems for a construction company. If your passion is kids and you want to open a daycare again, I want to help you fulfill that dream. There’s room on my land we could set up a separate building and make it official. It’s outside of town, but I doubt anyone in Sage River would complain about having to drive to get there; people drive to get to just about anything around here.”
A bright smile spread across her face, warming me right through as I stroked the back of her hand once more.
“Is that a yes?”
“I’m just marveling at the man you are and how I managed to get so lucky to have you all to myself.”
I chuckled, leaning in to kiss her when the door to the room opened. We sprang apart to see the doctor walking in with the nurse in tow.
“Hi there, Carolina.” He walked over to the machine, lifting the paper that recorded the heartbeats. He held it straight out, looking across the whole thing before he nodded to the nurse who left the room briefly and returned, rolling in an ultrasound machine. “The heartbeats look good, we’re just going to have a quick look, but otherwise, I’ll say this was just a scare, and I have no concerns.”
The nurse undid the monitors on her belly and dropped a dollop of gel onto it, rolling the wand across her skin until they found the first baby. The doctor looked over her shoulder as they did their examination, Carolina’s knuckles as white as a sheet as she clung to me.
“He said everything looks good. This is just a precautionary check.” I leaned in to kiss the top of her head again before the nurse turned the screen toward us.
“Alright, babies look good. Here’s baby A.” He pointed to the screen. “And this is baby B.” The nurse shifted the wand’s position, and he pointed to the second one. “Bleeding is more common in multiples pregnancies. But you made the right call coming in.” He smiled at both of us before peeling his gloves off and tossing them into the garbage. “I would say that I’d prefer you take it easy from here on out. We want to get you to the bare minimum finish line, even better if we can get you way past it. The longer we keep those babies in there, the shorter their NICU stay will be. If possible, try to maintain bedrest from here on out.”
“No worries about that, Doc. I’m going to wait on her hand and foot. She won’t need to lift a finger to do anything.”
He nodded approvingly. “Congrats. When you’re ready, you’re free to go.” He left us while the nurse helped Carolina clean up her belly before she left us too.
“My clothes are in the bag there.” She pointed to the chair at the end of the room as she carefully started to shift off the bed. I rose, grabbed them, and pulled them out, one by one, to help her get dressed.
“Do you feel better now that the doctor has told you everything is okay?”
“Yes, but I don’t think it’ll ever stop me from being totally anxious about this. It’s tough. I keep waiting for someone to tell me they’re gone because that’s what I’m so used to happening. Even between appointments, I get there, and as the OB pulls out the fetal doppler, I think to myself, this is it. He’s about to tell me he can’t find a heartbeat. Everything I do I second-guess if that’s the thing that will make a difference between these babies making it or not.”
As she spoke, I found myself coming to a stop as I stared at her, processing this truth she was sharing. Carolina had lived an entire life before me that left her with scars I hadn’t seen before, scars I didn’t know I needed to help her heal, and scars I now knew I could never help her heal. All I could do was be there for her when she needed a shoulder to cry on.
“What?” She finished tugging her shirt over her head to find me dumbstruck.
“I’m sorry. I’m just thinking about how much weight you’ve been carrying on your shoulders all this time, and I had no idea. It’s one thing to consider what you might be going through, but hearing that and understanding the kind of anxiety you’ve been feeling around this pregnancy … That’s a heavy load.”
“Thank you.” She smiled as she touched my cheek before bending down to yank her leggings on.
“I told the doctor that I was going to keep you from doing any heavy lifting, and I meant it, Care. If there’s anything else you’re carrying, I want you to share it with me. I want to try and take some of this load off you—that includes emotional stuff. So, promise you’ll treat me like your pack mule. That’s what I want to be for you. Hee haw.” I grinned at her, enjoying the laugh that escaped as she tried to hold it in and ended up snorting instead.
“I’ll do it if you always make that noise.”
I chuckled. “Deal.”
