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I grimace. Ah. We are speaking about something completely different from being simply hungover. Seth’s hands are rubbing his knees. He looks like he’s in pain. I want to help him, but I don’t know how and I don’t know if he will push me away.
“Is there anything I can do to help?” I ask, hoping he tells me.
Seth groans as he wobbles to stand. I watch him turn away from me, stepping the last few steps up and onto the second floor. I feel my heart plummet to my stomach and realize that I asked the wrong thing. He’s pushing me away again. Well, at least I tried.
I continue following him down the hall until we both stop in front of apartment 20. The soft sound of sobbing can be heard on the other side of the door followed by Rachel murmuring, “It’ll be okay.”
Seth reaches for the door, but stops, his gaze turning toward me. “Can you please order a pizza?” he asks, his voice strangled. Tears flood his eyes and his bottom lip quivers. “I really don’t think I can go through today without eating something.” He grimaces. “But I’m worried I’ll change my mind and won’t eat anything.” Seth groans, the sound coming out like a whimper, while he pushes his hair away from his face once more. “I’m so tired of this obsession, but I don’t think I can stop.”
“Let’s shake on it,” I say, holding out my hand between us. Seth stares at it as if will suddenly grow teeth and devour his fingers. “Promise to eat one slice. That’s it. I won’t bother you about the rest.”
Seth’s gaze lifts and he blinks back at me, looking so surprised. I have no clue about what. Is he surprised about my kindness? About how I don’t press? That I don’t judge? He nods slowly and takes my hand limply. “Okay,” he whispers. “One slice.”
I pull him toward me and wrap my arm around him, giving him an awkward hug. He tenses in my hold. Even I’m surprised with myself, but I’m not letting go. “I know we haven’t always gotten along,” I whisper into his ear. “But, I’m here for you. I will never judge and press you.”
Seth head bobs up and down, bumping against my chin and shoulder.
“And you will stop,” I say while pulling away. “It just takes time. Don’t give up on yourself.” I pat his shoulder before nodding at the door. “Let’s go in before they start wondering where we are.”
Seth chuckles and I watch him step forward, noticing the way his fingers twitch as he grabs the door handle, and how his feet wobble to keep him up. It will take time, but I believe Seth can fight this. He’ll definitely need to speak with someone. Perhaps a therapist? But I can’t make that decision for him. Only he can help himself and I will be there to support him.
The door opens and my eyes land on Rachel and Charlie, sitting on the floor, with Lauren sobbing in front of them, her hands in her face. I take out my phone, already searching for a local pizza joint. Today is going to be very long and we will all need something to keep our strength up.
