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Holden: God, Kay. I miss you. ? Please answer me soon.
Holden: I’m coming over. I can’t handle not talking to you.
I look up from my phone and glance over at Holden. Our eyes lock immediately and he shrugs, smiling sadly. I don’t bother replying. Instead, I go to my voicemails and play the one from my mother first.
“Kayleigh, it’s mom. You can’t answer your phone but you seem to have no problem spending my money. I need to know when your break is. John and I are going on vacation. Call me back.”
I roll my eyes, deciding to text her later and play the ones from Holden.
“Hey. It’s Holden. I don’t really know why your phone is off, but text me when you get this.”
“Kayleigh. This radio silence is killing me. What did I do wrong? Whatever it is, talk to me. I need to know you’re okay. Call me.”
In the second one, his voice sounds a lot different – sad, distraught almost. I steal another look at him, and the sight breaks me. Bree’s head is resting on his shoulder while his lays lightly against hers. He’s holding her hand, his thumb lightly grazing over hers in a back and forth motion. I can feel the tears building in my eyes, and before either of them can notice, I roll over and face the wall. My tears spill silently into my pillow until the effects of my medicine knock me out.
I WAKE TO A light kiss on my forehead. I stir, opening my eyes to find Holden standing above me. I look at him bewildered. He puts a finger to his mouth, indicating for me to be quiet, and gestures towards Bree. She’s lying on her bed, sound asleep.
“What are you doing?” I whisper.
He sits on my bed and gently removes the hair from my face. “I was so worried about you. You disappeared. What happened?”
The tears already threatening to return, I shake my head. “I just can’t do it.” He looks confused, so I continue. “I can’t be a part of you cheating on her. She’s my friend.”
He frowns and sighs dejectedly. “Okay.”
He leans forward and kisses me lightly. When he breaks the kiss, he stands up and walks out the door, leaving me alone to deal with the emotional wreckage.
I STAY IN BED ALL throughout Saturday and most of Sunday, ignoring the world like I had planned. On Monday, I stumble through my classes, not really paying attention to a single thing. By the time that I get back to my room, I just want to go to sleep. At first, it seems like Brianna had the same idea, however, the sound of her sniffling alerts me of otherwise.
“Bree?” I ask. “You okay?”
She rolls over, her eyes bloodshot and her face soaked from crying. My first instinct is to wonder who died. Instead, she tells me something I hadn’t expected.
“Holden broke up with me.”
Chapter Ten
I sit on Brianna’s bed, her head in my lap and my fingers gently running through her hair. She hasn’t stopped crying since I got back three hours ago. At first I was trying to talk her into calming down. However, it wasn’t doing any good, so instead, I’ve just been comforting her.
“I just thought we were so happy.” She sobs.
I sigh. “I know,
love.”
The guilt eats at my insides, my subconscious grimacing. When I had told Holden that I couldn’t do this anymore, I did not mean for him to break up with her. I expected the two of us to move on, go back to ignoring each other even. Her heartbreak was what I was trying to avoid.
My phone vibrates in my pocket, alerting me of a message. I take it out and open it.
Holden: Meet me at the creek at 9.
I don’t answer, not sure if I know what to say to him right now. I toss my phone across the room and onto my bed. I can’t risk Bree seeing a text from him. She is broken enough. I can only imagine how she would feel if she knew what’s been happening the past couple of weeks. Knowing that I may have caused this makes me feel sick inside.
BY THE TIME IT hits 8:45, Brianna is sound asleep. Her exhaustion finally knocked her out. I tuck her into bed, making sure she’s not going to wake up. When the coast is clear, I slip on my shoes and jacket, and quietly leave the room.
The walk to the creek is peaceful. The campus is normally empty around this time, except for the random stragglers from evening classes. It’s beautiful, however, it’s also bitterly cold. I pull the sleeves of my jacket over my hands and keep walking.
It’s funny, really. The creek runs through the entire campus, and yet, I know exactly which part he was referring to. The same spot we laid for hours just naming random stars. That was the night my opinions about him changed. Maybe that was when my feelings for him started to develop.
