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“Yet?” He asks hopefully.
I can’t help but smile at his excitement. “You have a lot of making up to do.”
A wet laugh leaves Holden’s mouth. He reaches forward, pulling me into a hug and squeezing tightly. I don’t fight him on it. Despite being hurt and angry, this is the only place I’ve wanted to be – wrapped in his arms as he kisses the top of my head. All I can do is hope I don’t regret this.
THE SILENCE IN THE room would be awkward if Bree and I weren’t both studying our asses off for finals. Since the other night, the two of us have settled our differences. It’s nice to have her back in my life. I’ve missed her witty charm.
“Ok. I have to ask.” She breaks the long lasting quiet, causing me to look up from my notes. “Have you talked to him?”
I knew this topic was bound to come up. Last night, I spent a few hours after work with Holden, but refused to sleep over. I didn’t want to jump into bed with him again and act like everything is fine. I wasn’t about to rub it in Bree’s face by bringing it up though. I just got her back, I don’t want to lose her again.
“Are you sure you want to talk about it? This isn’t weird for you?”
She waves her hand dismissively. “Please. It was months ago. I’m over it. Now, spill.”
I chuckle before explaining everything to her. The conversation with Holden and where we’re at now. She’s surprised when I tell her everything he said, but not when I tell her I’m giving him a second chance. She knows Holden and how hard he can be to resist.
“Just be careful. I don’t want to see you get hurt again.”
I give her a sad smile before we both go back to studying. To be completely honest, I’m not sure I have any control over whether I get my heart broken or not. Admitting it to myself for the first time – I am completely defenseless against Holden Rivers.
MY PHONE VIBRATES A little after five. I reach over and grab it from my nightstand, seeing a text message.
Holden: I’d like to take you to dinner.
A part of me starts to panic, knowing that he’s bound to catch on to my relapse eventually. I’ve lost almost eight pounds in the last four days. It’s addicting and there’s no end in sight.
Me: Sorry. Already ate.
I watch as the three dots appear, signifying me that he’s typing. I wait for his response, hoping he will take my excuse.
Holden: Ice cream then.
I should have known better. There are a lot of words I would use to describe Holden, but gullible is not one of them. Instead of trying to make up an excuse, I distract him in the best way I know how.
Me: I want something in my mouth,
but it’s not food. ??
Holden: I’m on my way.
I laugh, tossing my phone to the side and sitting up. As I put away my books, Bree looks at me curiously.
“Going out?”
I nod. “I’ll be back in a couple of hours. Do you want me to bring you back anything?”
She thanks me for the offer, but declines. I go into the bathroom and brush my teeth and my hair before heading out the door. As great as things are going with Bree, I don’t want to risk ruining it by Holden coming to the door to get me. I’d rather wait outside.
I should have thought to check the weather, because as soon as I get outside, I find it’s freezing. I’m about to head back up to grab a sweatshirt when Holden pulls up. Instead of asking him to wait, I climb into the car.
“Are you crazy? You’re going to get sick.” He takes off his hoodie and passes it to me.
“Well, now you’re going to get sick.”
“Better me than you. Take it.”
I roll my eyes playfully. “Bossy.”
