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She smiles sadly and reaches forward to place her hand on my arm. "Have you been using protection?"
"No." I mutter. "He's been pulling out though."
Bree takes a pillow and hits me over the head with it. It doesn't hurt, but it does knock me over. I don't complain – I knew that was coming.
"Could you be any more idiotic?! Condoms are free in the clinic!"
"I know, I know. Wait, we have a clinic?"
A pillow hits me in the face again, causing me to chuckle. Just when I'm about to say something else, Dawson taps on the bedroom door, effectively getting our attention. He focuses solely on me.
"Holden texted me. He's on his way here."
"What?!" The three of us shout in unison.
He puts his hands up defensively. "He said he wants to talk to me. I'll keep him in the living room. You can stay in here."
I sigh audibly. "Okay."
Dawson walks over and gives Sky a quick kiss before leaving the room. Bree’s eyes, however, stay on me.
"You okay?"
I shrug. "If I'm not, I will be."
AN HOUR LATER, I completely forget about Holden coming here when I decide to go into the kitchen to get a drink. Apparently, Bree and Skylar did as well, because neither one of them try to stop me. As soon as I step into view of the living room, Dawson and Holden both look up at me and I freeze.
"Uh, hi." I mumble. "I'm just getting a drink."
Dawson nods, but Holden looks at me differently – almost broken even. I down at the floor as I walk over to the kitchen. I open the cabinet and get a glass, then retrieve the apple juice from the fridge. Suddenly, I can feel someone next to me.
"Hey." Holden whispers.
I slowly look up, and find him looking at me with the same fondness he always has – it calms me.
"Hi."
He bites his lip as I smile, feeling the electricity in the air between us. "Listen, I just wanted to apologize for earlier. That was uncalled for, and I'm sorry."
"You were worried. I get it."
"Still, I went about it the wrong way."
I can't find the words, so I just nod and go back to pouring my drink. When I'm done, he takes the bottle from me and places it back in the fridge. I thank him quietly, and turn to lean against the island. He walks up and lightly grabs my hand with his.
"I'm going to give you your space, but I just want you to know that I'm here, for whatever you need." The honesty in his voice is overwhelming.
"Thank you." I reply.
He places his hand on my cheek and leans in to kiss me softly. My chest physically hurts when he pulls away, but I can't bring myself to tell him yet. So instead, I give him another sad smile before grabbing my glass and retreating to the bedroom.
Once the door closes behind me, my back hits it and I slide down to the floor. Bree and Skylar look up from the computer and both their eyes widen in realization. The tears begin to flow before I can even attempt to stop them, soaking my cheeks. My friends are at my side in an instant.
"Are you okay? What happened?"
I don't answer, letting the sobs wrack my body and, for once, allowing myself to feel.
I'M STANDING IN THE rain in front of the Kappa house, trying to find the will power to go inside. I was so determined when I decided to run here from Dawson's, but now I'm not so sure. It probably doesn't help that I'm drenched from head to toe.
