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He had taken that happiness and crushed it in his fist.
He had thought...
But what if it had gone differently?
He took his mind back there, to that moment.
For one moment, it was like he was there, at that dinner. Looking at her in that stunning dress as she said those words to him again.
I’m pregnant.
And this time, he made a new choice. The Krav in his vision changed.
He made a new story.
“But I told you... I told you not to worry. I told you that we would be in this together.” And he could see it, in his mind. It was the strangest thing. He could imagine holding her against him, taking hold of her chin and tilting her face upward. Kissing away her tears. In this story, he was a man he had never been. One who knew how to be tender if it was required.
“Have you been married before?”
“No,” he said.
“But you were ready to marry me?”
“Yes,” he said. “I was... I don’t have any other children, either. I did not plan on becoming a father. But once I found out... There was never any question of what I would do.”
And that again was true.
“Oh.” And she began to cry.
“Why are you crying?”
“Because... You say that as if...as if fathers just take care of their children. As if a man would obviously take care of the woman whose baby she’s having. But...that has not been my life. My father wanted nothing to do with me, my own mother didn’t care for me. And that I remember. But I can’t remember you... I can’t remember us. And it breaks my heart. Because I wish so much I could remember that moment. I bet it was the best moment of my life.”
And he hardened his heart, into stone. Into obsidian, because he could not afford to be moved by this.
Hell, he had never in his life had to try to not be moved by anything. Except for her beauty. Her beauty was...
It had been the thing that had gotten in and undermined his control in the beginning. And it hadn’t changed much now.
“We will put it back together. That I promise you. And then... You will know that you should be my bride. My wife.”
“Thank you,” she said.
“Knowing that we are in love. Knowing that you love me... It’s the greatest gift I could’ve ever asked for.”
And he knew that meant he must show her the truth of it as best he could.
He must weave together a story that was so compelling she could never find the lie. She would never want to. If she knew the man he was, she would not feel this way.
If she knew his flaws. His darkness.
She would run away again, as she had that night.
He would have to hope that she did not remember the truth.
CHAPTER FIVE
RIOTHADBEENafraid to go to sleep that night. She had been asked to be taken to Soriya’s room, and there she had stayed. She had held her baby, gazing down at her and trying to understand how her life had taken such a strange new shape so quickly.
