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“Because everyone I love always hurts me.”
And I was afraid that Imani would, too. I was afraid that she’d realize I was nothing but dirt under her feet and kick me to the curb. I was afraid that she’d realize I wasn’t going anywhere in life and that I was dragging her down with me. And I didn’t fucking want that.
“What do you want?”
“I want her to love me back.”
Misty sat back and smiled at me. “I think that’s a good place to end for today.”
After running out of there and away from my feelings as quickly as I could, I sat on the curb outside my house because Mom and Dad were at it again, and I ran through all the messages that Imani had ever written to me, thought about all the hours of video calls we had.
Most of this time hadn’t been spent dirty talking. Most of this time had been … spent talking.
Incoming Video Call: Imani
I sat up straight and hovered my finger over the Accept Callbutton, then finally pressed it. Imani stood in her bathroom, tapping some cream on her face.
She looked down at the phone, brown eyes wide. “I didn’t think you’d answer.”
“What do you want?” I asked, cursing at myself for letting the words come out of my mouth like that. But I … I didn’t want to remember what I had admitted only a few minutes ago. I couldn’t have Imani know that I really loved her.
She scrunched her nose and walked into her bedroom, collapsing on her bed with some pillows. “My mom is coming home in ten minutes. I’ll be studying all night. I wanted to talk to you.”
My chest tightened. “To me?”
“Unless you’re busy.”
I hopped up from the curb and walked down the street, giving her a small smile. “I have time.”
