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That taken care of, I picked up the notebook that I’d jotted down all of the ideas that Evan and I had discussed and flipped through it. There were so many great thoughts inside. All I wanted was to get started, maybe to go over some more concepts with Evan soon.
But I had to begin somewhere. So, after doing a little bit of research I found a great website builder and signed up for a plan. I could fill it in later with my portfolio and all that good stuff, but the important thing was that I’d taken the first step.
When that was done, Mom appeared in my mind. I felt like a hypocrite, having given the advice that I had to Jay about his dad when I still had a sore relationship with my own mother.
I wanted to do something about it. Not only that, but she needed to know about Adam. It’d been no secret that she’d been holding out hope of me and him patching things up. It was time I made it clear to her that it wasn’t going to happen.
After throwing back the last sip of my coffee, I picked up my phone and typed up a text to Mom asking her what she was doing. I could tell by her response that she was curious as to what I wanted.
Come on over, she said, following up her first message. My lunch with the girls got canceled, Janine is still recovering from her tummy tuck.
After taking a quick shower and changing out of last night’s clothes, I grabbed my things and hurried out the door. Moments later I was behind the wheel of Clarissa’s bug. I had a big smile on my face the entire drive. I felt strange, different. It was like I was starting off on a new adventure, one where I’d be filling my life with things that I wanted, rather than what I was expected to want.
It was a little scary, sure, but what was an adventure without some uncertainty? Either way, I was totally confident in my ability to see it all through, to make my life into something worth being proud about. Mom needed to know how I felt. She needed to know that whatever my life might hold, it wouldn’t involve Adam.
When I pulled up to Mom’s house, however, the excitement faded a bit and was replaced by fear. As I parked in front of the sleek mansion of glass walls, I realized that I was going to have to do something, rather than just imagine it.
I took a deep breath and got out, entering the house without knocking.
“Is that you, dear?” asked Mom, her carefree voice drifting through the open space. “I’m in the back. Grab yourself something to drink and meet me out here.”
“OK!” My throat was tight as I spoke – I was nervous.
I went into the kitchen and pulled a bottle of sparkling water from the fridge. That in hand, I made my way out to the back patio, the view looking out over the large, rectangular pool and to the ocean beyond.
I had to give it to Mom – she really knew how to live.
She was seated at the small four chair table near the doors, and as I approached, she glanced back at me with a smile on her face.
“So happy you decided to come by!” she said. “Sit, sit!”
I hurried over and sat down next to her. For several moments the two of us said nothing to one another, and I found myself wondering if Mom knew something that I didn’t.
“So!” she said. “I’m sure you’ve heard the good news!”
“What’s that?” I already didn’t like the sound of it.
“Adam is back in town!”
Uh-oh.
“But I’m sure he’s gotten in touch with you already, right?”
“He has. How did you know he was here?”
“Because he told me, of course!”
I sighed and sat back, opening the bottle of sparkling water with a hard twist that mimicked what I wanted to do to Adam’s scrawny pencil neck. Him getting in touch with my mom wasn’t because he liked her. Nope. I knew Adam well enough to understand that if he let my mom know that I was in town she’d put the pressure on me to get back together with him – his usual underhanded bullshit.
“You…don’t seem happy about this,” said Mom. “I can’t imagine why. You ask me, this is a perfect opportunity to sort things out between the two of you. Why you broke up to begin with, I still have no idea. But he’s handsome and wealthy and from a good family, and in my opinion he—"
“It’s not happening!” The words came out of my mouth like a thunderclap. Mom stopped speaking, her eyes going wide. “Not now, not ever. Mom, I didn’t tell you this because I didn’t want to worry you. But, one night when Adam and I were arguing, he got really pissed at me and punched the wall only a few inches from me.”
“He…he what? Adam Myles?” She said his name as if I might’ve gotten him confused with some other Adam.
“The one I dated, Mom, yes” I said. “And yeah – there’s a side to him that you don’t know about. He gets angry when he doesn’t get his way. I put up with it for years. I mean, everyone always talked about him like he was the catch of Charmed Bay. So, I believed that if I thought there was something wrong with him it was my fault.”
Mom said nothing, watching me with concern. Tears formed in my eyes, and she didn’t waste a second in reaching into her purse and taking out some tissues.
