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“At what? Screwing up my life? My friendships? My daughter?”
“See—that’s what I mean. You’re not just thinking one step ahead. You’re trying to seefiftysteps ahead of every single move you make.” Tani gripped Zoey’s hand and squeezed it. “You can’t control everything. And you shouldn’t try. Let’s start with the basics. You’re a great mom. You have a moderately successful business. Your house is paid for. You’re a smart, attractive woman who, regardless of the opinions of a thirteen-year-old child,deservesto have a man in her life if she wants one.”
Tani dipped her head lower so she could look up at Zoey’s face. “Mike makes you happy? The sex is good? You’re still friends?”
Zoey didn’t hesitate. “Yes. But...”
“No buts. You are two mature, compassionate people who are not doing anything wrong. You’ve talked it out, right? You’re both going in with the same expectations? Friendly and on the down-low?”
Zoey nodded.
“As far as Hazel goes,” Tani continued. “I understand you want to shield her from any more stress. But the reality is, her parents are divorced. You moved her into a new house. Chris is marrying Genna, who’s having a baby. It’s a lot, but Hazel has navigated all of that really well.” Zoey started to argue, but Tani talked over her. “Was she upset when you and Chris told her about the divorce?”
“Very.” There had been weeks of tears and bargaining and pleading.
“Is she okay with it now?”
“Relatively. She’ll never be thrilled, but she accepts it.”
“And Chris and Genna? Isn’t she about to be in their wedding party?”
“Well, yes, but it doesn’t mean it was easy for her to reach that point,” Zoey answered, thinking of her comment about coming in third or fourth in her dad’s life. She needed to feel number one to Zoey. And Hazel didn’t hate Genna. They were bonding over dress shopping.Hooray...
“Exactly,” Tani said with a nod. “Hazel has handled everything life has thrown at her so far. If your relationship with Mike goes anywhere, she’ll deal with that, too. It’s not like shereallywants you to move to a convent. Kids tend to just say ridiculous stuff like that.” She chuckled. “When Tyson was ten, he told me that if Ireallyloved him I’d quit my job so I’d always be home when he needed me. But I told him he wouldn’t have been very happy without all the toys and amusement park trips my income gave us.”
Zoey drained her coffee cup and walked over to the sink to rinse it. Then she stopped, turning to face her friend with narrowed eyes.
“Three years ago? Isn’t that when you went from full-time to part-time at the furniture store? So you’d be home more?”
Tani laughed. “Yes, okay. Ididadjust my life for him. My point is that I didn’t upend it completely, or deny myself a job I love because of something my little boy said when he was upset. My job makes me happy. And that makes me a better person. Which makes me a better mom.”
“Are you saying having a wild love affair with Mike McKinnon will make me a better person?”
“You’ve already said he makes you happy, so...yeah.” Tani stood and joined Zoey at the sink. “Of course, that’s assuming one of you doesn’t break the other’s heart.”
CHAPTER NINETEEN
“VICKIE,WENEEDto talk.” Gordon...Gordy...set his coffee mug on her counter.
“Oh, God.” She rolled her eyes. “Is this about the deck? Did you find somethingelsethat needs to be rebuilt?”
“It’s not about the deck. It’s about you and me. And your kitchen pantry. And a certain kiss from a couple weeks ago that you haven’t mentioned since.”
“You haven’t mentioned it, either.” Vickie straightened, arching her eyebrow to emphasize her winning point.
He folded his arms, not looking defeated in the least. “Kinda hard to mention something to someone who won’t stay in the same air space as me for more than three seconds.”
That was fair. Shehadbeen avoiding him. Half because she didn’t want them to get carried away again. And half because she was hoping they would. And that would be... A disaster? Wonderful? She hadn’t decided yet.
“Well, I’m standing here now,” she said. “What do you want to say?”
His square jaw, covered with salt-and-pepper stubble, moved back and forth as he studied her. “Look, if you don’t want to kiss me again, just say so, Vickie. I can handle it.” He took a step in her direction. “But I get the funny feeling you’re avoiding me because youwantto kiss me, and you’re scared. The thing is, the Vickie Mallory I used to know wasn’t scared of anything. So... I’m confused.” He scrubbed his hand over his face, making that stubble sound like sandpaper. “I don’t like this silent treatment you’ve been giving me. Tell me what’s going on in that pretty head of yours.”
Vickie pressed her tongue against her top lip and stared at the floor, struggling to hold in her thoughts. And failing. Still looking down, she let the words tumble out.
“I’m a vain woman, Gordon Lexiter. Always have been. You know that. If we kiss again, I’m going to want...more. And I haven’tdonemore in a long time. I’m not the high school senior you shagged in the back seat of your mom’s Buick. My body has changed.I’vechanged...”
Memories of that long ago night had been keeping her awake ever since they’d kissed in the pantry. Homecoming dance. A warm fall night. A short drive to a dark country road in the hills above Rendezvous Falls.
