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“A little open. He kind of caught me mid gasp. I didn’t see it coming and then”—I fling my hands up, Kermit-style—“there it was!”
Julia makes one of those sort of noncommittal noises and I nod.
“See what I mean? It’s not like he had BO or a saliva problem.”
“No, Rux always smells good,” she says, picking at the peel of a Halo orange like she’s trying to make confetti.
“He really does.” Reaching across the table, I smack her hands away, peel that sucker in one strip, and hand it back.
She’s impressed. And rightly so. But the awe over a Halo peel has a shelf life of maybe three seconds and Julia is still looking at me. Or maybe watching me would be more accurate.
“What?”
Her head angles to the other side. “Rux.”
“No.” I know where she’s going and justno. She keeps watching, and I heave an impatient breath. “Julia, I know it would be all kinds of adorable if I ended up with your hubby’s wingman, but as much as I love Rux”—and I absolutely do—“we exist solely in the friend zone.”
“Mmm.”
“Seriously?”
She gives me one of those nearly imperceptible shrugs she mastered back in high school and waits. So apparently, yes. Seriously.
“Fine. I’ll break it down for you. Rux is incredible. He’s loyal and funny. Good looking. And he might love me almost as much as he loves my kid.”
“Rux is the best.”
“I know, right?” I sigh at how lucky I am to have him in my life.
“And maybe someday he’ll get it into his head for five seconds that married life might be fun—and ten seconds later, he’ll make some bunny a very lucky WAG. But not me.”
“He’s successful, fun-loving, emotionally available, into your kid, and come on with the ‘good-looking’ business. He’shot. Not like Greg, but if you like them just a little wild.”
“Yeah, see, right there. That’s the issue. I don’t want wild. I wantstable. Reliable.”
Julia levels me with one of her no-BS looks. “You don’t want wild?”
Dang it, she knows what she’s doing. And now I’m thinking about what everythingwildmight encompass and I feel a bit warm. “Not for anything more than a date with Bob.” Who doesn’t like a good fantasy now and then?
She snorts, rolling her eyes.“Bob, your battery-operated boyfriend? You have to stop calling those dates, Cammy. It makes me sad.”
It might make me sad too if I let myself think about it too much, but I don’t. What I think about are all the ways I’m so incredibly lucky in my life. With Matty. My sister. Rux, who definitely falls under thelittle bit wildheading—which is why he’s so much better as a friend.
“Whatever. All I’m saying is that wild is fine for fantasies. But it’s not what I’m looking for long-term.” And we both know, long-term is, ultimately, what I’m after. My very own happily ever after. “I want a nice guy. A guy who’s in it for the long haul, someone Matty and I can count on… I want a guy who’s maybe a little bittired.”
“What?” she laughs, shaking her head.
“I’m not interested in a guy who’s going to have temptation thrown in his face every other hour for the rest of his career—whether it’s another team, a more beautiful woman, or just the next adventure. I want the guy who’salready had the adventureand maybe just likes the idea of staying home.”
“Staying home? You get out like once every other week.” She looks around, eyeing the apartment we used to live in together. “These are some cushy digs, but Cammy, seriously, haven’t you had your fill of staying home?”
I wave her off. “Fine, staying homesometimes. You know what I mean. Yes, I want to fall in love and be swept off my feet. I want that heart-pounding, whole-body need to get closer… to have more.” I bite my lip and rest my head in my hand. “But above all that, I want the guy who’s going to fall in love with being a part of our family. So whilewildsounds like some toe-curling fun… I’m after the happily ever after that gives Matty the kind of stability and security you and I never had growing up with Mom and her parade of deadbeats.”
Julia groans, shaking her head. “Bill.”
“Tim.”
“Sal.”
