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“Believe me, it is. You do something shitty and deny feeling bad about it and do something even shittier.” A frustrated growl leaves his lips, he drops my arm and storms away, kids parting to let him through. I rub the spot on my arm, knowing there will probably be a bruise later. A thrill grows inside me when he gets rough. Emory looks over at me when the last of the students pile out.
“You wanted to see me?” I ask.
“Yes, I didn’t want to say anything because it isn’t my place to disclose information on another student, but be careful, my nephew has stalker tendencies. He fought for a girl once before, and she left here after they broke up because Diesel became obsessed with her. My brother covered the whole situation up.” He really is grasping at straws to keep me away from Diesel. I doubt it’s because he has a thing for me, he has never been inappropriate towards me, it has to be something he wants to take Diesel down for. I don’t know what Diesel was like before I came here, but I have been told some stories.
“I don’t know what to say.” Diesel doesn’t seem like the stalker type, I think he would just take what he wanted.
“Just be careful, and call me if you ever need anything, if he gets to be too much.” Mr. Briar hands me his number scribbled on a piece of paper.
“Why are you trying to help me? It really doesn’t make sense.” I decide to go the direct approach; he runs a hand through his well-manicured stubble.
“Because I read your file, Cyrus, you have been through a lot and don’t deserve the things he will do to you.” He is being sincere, and I’m grateful someone actually cares, but if he really knew how messed up I was and what I really did, he wouldn’t think the same.
“The things you need to know about me are not in my file, Emory. I’m not a good person; I need him, and that is all I can say about it.” I leave the room, tucking the number in my laptop bag. With a few minutes until my next class, I race to the toilets to wash my face before I cry again.
Splashing my face, I look in the mirror, pulling my hair back and staring at the scar above my ear. That’s when I notice the huge hickey on my neck, how did I miss that this morning? The door opens, and Kelby, Blaine, and Taleah walk in. Kelby smiles at me, not a smile between friends, one that says I have you right where I want you.
“Did you see the photos of Diesel leaving my room this morning? I told you he always comes running back to me.” Here we go again, she thinks she can make me jealous, and maybe if Diesel were Zeke, she would gain that reaction from me, but he isn’t.
“I still don’t believe anything happened.” I roll my eyes and rub the back of my neck.
“You think just because he fucked you first, he didn’t let me ride him the rest of the night? He told me he was in it to get your virginity, and the game was over now.” I turn to face her.
“Sucks to be him, I wasn’t a virgin. You say he is using me; did it even cross your mind that it goes both ways? Maybe hold back on the bleach to regain some of your brain cells. Now listen carefully. I. DO. NOT. CARE. If you screw him. It’s all a game, he knows it, I know it, shit most of the students know it.” Her mouth hangs open at my rant. Pushing past her and her minions, I run into Luna, we have class together this period, along with Rebel and Cuyler.
“Are you okay?” She asks as we walk towards class
“I had a run in with Kelby. That bitch makes my blood boil, and Mr. Briar says Diesel is a crazy stalker, but look at him, he doesn’t need to stalk girls.” I say the last part to try and dig for information. I’m curious why they hate each other.
“Him and his uncle don’t get along so I would be careful, their whole family is a bit off.”
***
Class goes fast, Cuyler keeps both Luna and I entertained most of the lesson, pulling faces, and it was a welcome relief to be out of my head for an hour. When class is dismissed for the first break, we step out into the hallway. I gasp, the walls are covered in flyers of Diesel's face with ‘I’m sorry’ across it.
“Hey, Cyrus.” A boy I don’t know says. “Diesel said he is sorry, please forgive him.” He doesn’t wait for a reply, he just walks away, and he isn’t the only one. A few other random kids stop me on the way to the cafeteria. Luna gushes about how crazy sweet he is being, which is a change of tune for her because I know she hates him as much as I hate Wilder. Every girl always wants to tame the bad boy, but it is honestly hard to believe when that only seems to happen in books.
“I think he actually likes you. I thought I would see hell freeze over first, but I kinda like this Diesel.” Bloody hell, I wanted him to like me, evoke some feeling, I don’t want him to bloody fall in love with me. Fuckity, fuck, fuck.
“Yeah, me too.” I say with a smile on my face. I’m here to pay a debt. I thought I could have fun doing it, and now it looks to be getting serious. I don't know if I can do it. I take a deep breath, it’s time to play the part.
“Go claim your man.” Luna says, almost shoving me through the cafeteria doors. He stands at our table, holding a flyer over his face. I go to him, stopping just in front of him, knowing we have a crowd.
“You’re forgiven.” I say, pulling the paper from his hands. Standing on my tippy toes, I press my lips to his, kids whistle and clap.
“I’m new to this, I’m going to mess up all the time, but I would never cheat on you. Those pictures only show half-truths,” he says, placing his hands on my ass and pulling me into his length. I can feel the hardness through my uniform, at least this will have its benefits.
“I didn’t believe it. I’m not a stranger to mean girls and popular boys, I was mad about your comment about Zeke. He was a huge part of my life, and I will never forget him.” We sit side by side, our public display of affection over, his hand rests on my leg.
“I promise to be less of a dick about Zeke, I know he meant a lot to you.”
“Thank you.”
Cuyler and Blaine sit opposite us, while Luna and Wilder take a seat next to me. They all chatter amongst themselves, and the rest of the group join the table one by one.
“So are you love birds coming to the bonfire this weekend?” Kelby drawls, trying to sound genuine. I refrain from rolling my eyes at her.
“No.” Diesel says, not offering an explanation. I look at him and silently ask why. I’m not scared of fire, just the unexpected boom when it’s being lit.
