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“Shit, you’re right, but me and Blaine, it’s complicated.”
“Yeah, well, what you saw is complicated, I need to know what his agenda is. Why does he care so much about me being with his nephew? What’s his angle because he’s a smart man, and he doesn’t strike me as someone who would sleep with a student and ruin his career. Can you not tell Diesel? He will overreact, and look at what he did to you over sending me a flower.”
“How do you know it was him...okay, it was, and I deserved it, but I’m so sick of everything. I want to throw it all away and travel the world, catch some sick waves and enjoy life, not worry about fathers and business deals. I’m eighteen, I don’t want to regret not living when I’m sitting at home with two point five kids and a white picket fence.”
“Sounds like a dream, I plan to travel the world. As soon as I graduate, I’m gone, I won’t be an embarrassment to my family since they won’t have to see me. I won’t be always thinking about Zeke and the what-ifs, and my nightmares might disappear. This may all be some kind of game to Diesel, don’t look so shocked that I know, once I leave he will forget all about me.”
“Let’s do it.” He says, starting the golf buggy.
“Do what?” I question, holding on as he jerks forward.
“Travel the world together, the day we leave this place. We disappear, tell no one and just go, as friends. We can just get on a plane. Even just for a year, we can always go to uni if we want to.”
“You would really want to travel with me? I’m a head case, I’m with a guy for the thrill of the game, and I almost kissed a teacher.”
“I’m in a meaningless relationship because it’s good business, and I keep messing with my friend's girl because her friendship means a lot to me, even if it means getting my ass beat every day.”
“Holy shit, we're pathetic, looks like we need to pick our leave day and destination, friend.”
“Maybe friends with benefits.” He looks at me, lifting a brow.
“Watch the road, and no benefits, but I can be your wing woman and help you get all the babes.”
He pulls into the dorm's basement. I notice Diesel's is parked in the corner.
“I should go check if he’s okay, since we had a fight, and clearly, he took it out on you.”
“If you ever need me, I’m a call away. You have only seen the nice Diesel, when he turns and he will, just know I’m there.”
Cuy stays in his buggy, looking defeated. I leave him and make my way to the lift, taking it to the top floor. Diesel and I need to talk. I’m over the games, if he wants us to be together, we need to cut the shit, I just don’t know if I’m ready to tell him about the deal with his father just yet.
Taking a deep breath, I scan my bracelet pushing the door. “We need to talk, put all the shit on the table…” Instantly I forget what else I was going to say, and my mouth hangs open. “What…”
The windows have black-out curtains installed, and fairy lights hang around the room. The floor between our beds has a blanket, assorted pillows and a food platter of cheese, meats, and fruit. Diesel stands solemnly in front of the darkened windows, his normal smirk and cocky attitude nowhere to be seen. Clutched tightly in his hand is a single red rose, the slight bend of the stem betraying how nervous he is right now.
I go to open my mouth to finish what I was saying, but he holds up a hand stopping me from speaking.
“Look, I’m sorry for acting like a jerk. I’m an asshole, Cyrus, you haven’t seen the real me, I told you before, I’m done with the games, and I don’t care what my father wants or my uncle's games. I will walk away to give us a shot. Please forgive me. This is all alien to me, and I like who I am when you’re in the room. Everyone says I don’t have a heart, and they were right, but the day I first saw you, it beat for the first time and hasn’t stopped since. Believe me when I say this isn’t a game to me as of today, if you have questions, I will answer them.”
He beckons me forward, and we sit on the blanket. I don’t care about the games anymore, we need to clear the air so we can move forward.
“Will you accept that Cuy and I are only friends?” I ask, popping a strawberry in my mouth.
“Yes, that’s why I went to see him today. Believe it or not, he threw the first punch. We’re not good with words around here, it isn’t how we were raised, but we’re good now."
“What about your uncle, what’s his deal?”
“He is bitter. Everything gets handed to me once I graduate uni, but he wants it bad, and the only way he can get that is by taking me out, making me look incompetent. There are a few other ways he can gain power, but how about we talk about it later, it isn’t important.”
He slides his hands behind my neck and pulls me into his lips. Not much talking was done after that, clothes were discarded, limbs were tangled, and dinner was skipped.
Maybe I could be happy again. Maybe I don’t need a forever, mine died all those months ago, but I can have a ride or die, one to start mending the pain of the past and fill the cracks. As quickly as those thoughts enter my head, I shake them away. He isn’t serious, he can’t be, and I couldn’t be even if I wanted to, his father won’t allow it. He has that tape, and I refuse to let Zeke’s family down, I will do what needs to be done.
Even if that means breaking Diesel’s heart. I just hope after it’s all out in the open, he will forgive me and understand why I had to do it.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Diesel
