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“It doesn’t stop him from acting like a jerk.”
“That’s Noah, stubborn like the rest of the men in the family. I’ll call you later, and we’ll arrange something.”
Kate kisses me goodbye, then enters the car. When the engine starts, she waves goodbye, but my father can’t even look my way.
And then, before he takes off, he glances over.
No smile, no anger, just pity.
Turning my back, I enter the house, closing the door behind me. With my body resting against the large wooden door, I close my eyes for just a moment.
I can stand here and lie to myself, just like I lied straight to his face.
But the truth is—I’m miserable.
And the one person who can see right through my lies is the first man ever to own my heart.
I’ve always been a Daddy’s girl.
Now, I’m his disappointment.
Maybe that’s what bothers me the most. Everything he pointed out is exactly what I continue to bury.
I can paint this beautiful life I’ve built with Benedict, but in reality, most of the time is spent alone. Being alone isn’t hard. It’s the assumption no one cares about me.
But I wanted this life. I chose it.
So, there’s no choice but to continue living this way because nothing in the world will change it.
No matter how much I can wish for things to be different.
Two
Jessa
When I first traveled to London two years ago, I fell in love with the city.
London is breathtakingly beautiful, and there’s something to be said about a place that can evoke so much emotion from you. It’s one of those places with so much history. Wherever you visit, there’s a story behind the old-time building or monument, and much like all the other tourists, I stood with wide eyes, absorbing the history in awe.
My fascination grew as the days carried on from taking a tour of Buckingham Palace, which took almost a day in itself, to walking down the streets and admiring the colored front doors of Notting Hill. As I took it all in, I realized how much I yearned to explore and fuel this part of me into my writing. Wherever I went, I carried the leather-bound journal my father gave me for Christmas the year before and jotted down my thoughts like diary entries to record the memorable moments.
Being alone for the first time in my life gave me ample time to do just that and discover what I wanted without the noise around me—noise from other people which became too loud at times.
My entire life was spent in Los Angeles. However, my parents were always traveling and brought us kids along whenever it didn’t interfere with our schooling. Yet as much as I love the States, being here feels just as nice.
The only thing I struggle with is the weather.
Today is no exception.
The drive to London is dreary and gray. As usual, our driver keeps to himself as I sit in the back and stare out the window. I’m eager to get behind the wheel despite being on the other side of the road, but Benedict talked me out of learning, insisting there’s no point since we have drivers on call.
Halfway into the drive, I quickly check my phone to be bombarded with group chat notifications from my cousins again. It’s hard to keep up, but I scroll back a few screens trying to decipher what the conversation is about.
Millie:All I’m saying is that marriage isn’t always a bed of roses, and also, my husband is a dick. I have every right to be annoyed that he’s at some business function with hot women.
Ava:You’re hormonal.
Addy:Will loves you and would never cheat on you. We’re talking about the same guy who literally kisses the ground you walk on.
