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“No,” I admit, shaking my head. “Have you?”
Delaney gives a shrug. “Does paintball count?”
Laughing, I pull her back down to my shoulder. “No, Laney, it doesn’t. But look, we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it. For now, let’s just take each day as it comes.”
She lets out a long sigh, nodding against my shoulder as she slowly slides her arm around my stomach. We lie in silence for a few moments, the crackling fire the only sound in the cabin. It feels nice lying together like this, strangely peaceful, as though the argument from earlier is long forgotten. I’m certain there will be more of them in the days to come, but for now, I just want to enjoy this moment with her while it lasts.
Suddenly, she pulls herself from my arms and stands, walking over to the makeshift kitchen and grabbing a knife. Sitting up, I watch as she turns and walks back toward me, holding it in her hand.
“Shit, Laney,” I say, hands out in front of me. “What the fuck are you—”
She laughs, winking at me as she walks over to the cabin door. “Relax, Alex,” she says, holding the knife up to the wood. I watch in silence as she starts to carve something into the back of the door, a look of concentration on her face. When she’s finally done, she turns back to me, a smile on her face.
“What’s that?”
She shrugs again, walking back over to the kitchen. “We should keep track of days,” she says, opening the pantry as her gaze moves over the cans stacked inside. “Every night before we sleep, we need to carve a notch in the door. It can be a badge of honor or something. A reminder of the days we kicked this cabin’s ass.”
I laugh. “Okay, I’m really hoping there won’t be too many to carve though.”
“Me too,” she says, turning to me with a can in each hand. “What do you feel like for dinner tonight, peaches or soup?”
“How about a steak and a beer?” I suggest with a smile.
“Fuck, I wish,” she says with a sigh, as she drops a can back on the shelf before grabbing the can opener and a spoon. “Soup it is.”
She walks back over to the mattress and sits as I take the can from her hand, opening it before putting it on top of the stove so it can heat up. While we wait, I flop back onto the mattress, smiling a little when Delaney does the same, shuffling closer so her head is once again resting on my shoulder.
“Can I ask you something?” she eventually asks.
I run my hand casually over her hair and down her back. “Sure.”
She takes a deep breath, letting it out slowly before she asks, “Why are you and your dad fighting?”
I burst out laughing, shaking my head a little. “Wow, way to jump right in there, Laney.”
“What?” she says, jabbing me in the side. “I mean come on, Alex. We’re stuck here for god knows how long, why not get to know each other some more. It beats fighting, doesn’t it?”
I glance down to find her looking up at me, an almost hopeful look on her face. Smiling, I shake my head a little before turning my gaze back to the ceiling. “Yes, Laney, it does,” I admit. “As much as I know you won’t believe me, I don’t actually like fighting with you, you know.”
“I know, me either,” she whispers, before poking me in the side again. “Now quit stalling and answer my question.”
I huff out a breath, my hand scrubbing down my face as I try to picture her reaction to what I’m about to admit. They are words I’ve never said out loud to anyone, not even Max or Nick. “My dad doesn’t think I take life seriously enough,” I eventually say. “He’s always on my ass about finding a real job and shit. And well I guess…I guess that only got worse after he found out I flunked out of my final semester at college.”
Delaney doesn’t say anything to my admission, which is not the reaction I expected. I’ve never told anyone I failed and didn’t actually graduate, not even Max and it feels weird to have her literally not react at all.
“You know,” she eventually says, flattening her hand against my chest, where I’m sure she can feel my heart pounding, “I also flunked out of college. Fucked up an awesome scholarship and everything.”
“Yeah, I know,” I exhale. “And I’m sure your parents were pissed too, but fuck, Laney, I got all the way to my final semester. Four fucking years and still I have nothing to show for it.”
“Alex,” she says, propping herself up on her elbow, her other arm across my chest. “My parentswerepissed. Still are. Flunking out in the first year didn’t make that any better. And for the record,” she says, pausing as she points a finger at me, “they also think I’m working in a crappy job and not really facing up to my mistakes.”
“So,” I say, grabbing her finger and giving it a gentle tug. “What you’re saying is we’re both a couple of fuck ups?” I smile, letting her know I’m only joking, even if I’m also not.
“Exactly,” she says, pulling her finger from my grip and tapping the end of my nose. “You don’t get to own the whole woe-is-me-my-life-is-a-fucking-disaster, Alex, ’cause I’m right there with you.”
Chuckling, I pull her back down so she’s lying on my shoulder again. It feels like a huge relief to not only have admitted what happened back in Colorado to her, but to also have her get it. I don’t know why I doubted that she would because back when things were good between us, a big part of that was because I knew I could just be myself around her. If I was ever game enough to try anyway.
“It was because of a guy, right?” I ask, running my hand down her back again. “Why things got fucked up for you?”
