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“You do?” Zade asks. He sucks in a few breaths and searches my eyes like he will find the answers he seeks within my gaze.
I nod my head and lick my lips. “So much. I don’t know what it is about us in this moment, but I feel as if I need you. I crave you. It hurts me to even think about you rejecting me. I know I shouldn’t push you, but I want to so badly.”
Zade groans, the husky rasp of his voice vibrating through me. “Push me. Break me. I’m tired of resisting. I’m tired of straddling the line that my whole being has already crossed, even if I haven’t on this physical plane. So push me. Show me what you want from me.”
My heart races at the thought of yanking his shirt over his head and brushing my lips to his taut chest, working my way down to suck his cock into my mouth like I had done before. My mouth waters at just the thought, because the last time he came in my mouth, it was if I was having an out-of-body experience. And he tasted so incredible. Even better than he smells. It’s strange and exciting.
“Are you sure? This could be it for you. Do you think it’s worth it?” I hate asking because I don’t want to know the answer. I don’t want to know whether he thinks I’m worth it or not. But I have to put the words out there. It needs to be said.
“You’re the only thing worth anything to me right now.” Zade flips me over and bends down, drawing his tongue over my neck until he reaches my ear and sucks my lobe into his mouth. “I love you, Raven. You have given me a gift that I never knew I wanted. You’ve always been so caring. You even let me see Andre when you didn’t have to. You are the most perfect, pure, balanced soul in the entire universe.”
I smile at his words, letting them fill me up with warmth and excitement. His light entangles with mine in a world that seems to fade away until it’s only me and Zade. His wings press the ground beside me, and I can’t help running my fingers over the glittering feathers. I expect my hands to burn, but they don’t. I thought that maybe I still couldn’t touch something so heavenly because I burned myself on Cassius, but I think that was different. He might have done that on purpose to keep me from hurting him. But Zade? I’ve never felt anything like his wings before. They’re soft and light as if I caress a cool mist, but my fingers remain dry. It’s unbelievable. Miraculous even.
“How is this possible?” I ask, unable to resist voicing the questions running through my mind. “Your wings still glow with heavenly light, but I can touch them as I touch Dante’s. Do you think you’ve abandoned grace?”
He shakes his head, easing away to look into my eyes. I search his face, my stare drinking in Lucian's mark still branded on his cheek from when I slapped him weeks ago. It glows, but it looks the same. He looks the same. There’s no Hell in him yet. But I know it’s going to change. I can feel it.
“I don’t have to abandon grace just to be with you, Raven. I don’t know when it’ll happen. It’s not as easy as just deciding. But I don’t want you to worry about that. I want you to be with me. I want to feel what it is like to claim your body. Will you let me?” Zade slowly draws his hand from my cheek and down my chest until he cups my boob, strumming his thumb over my hard nipple through my shirt.
“Yes,” I say, knowing he needs to hear the words for sure. “Show me what it’s like to be with an angel.”
I wonder if it will be gentle. I wonder if it will be more like making love than having sex. I also can’t help but wonder if I should be the one in control to teach him what I like.
I don’t get the chance, because Zade uses his wings to launch us from the floor and to the bed. The lamp crashes from the nightstand, knocked over from Zade’s outstretched wings. I grin and kiss him, locking my fingers to the back of his neck, exploring his tongue with mine. Reaching between us, Zade grabs the hem of my shirt and tugs it up and over my head. He shifts his body until he nestles between my legs and kneels, undressing me faster than I thought him capable of.
My body quivers in anticipation, and goosebumps prickle over my skin. He licks his lips and stares at me as I lie naked and exposed before him. Taking his shirt off, he starts to undress for me, going much slower without taking his gaze from my body. His wings flap, sending a cool breeze over me. I shift and squirm in anticipation, the intensity of his gaze as hot as any of the devils’ Hell power.
I half expect one of the devils to come charging in from the other suite, but they don’t. They won’t unless I call for them because I asked them to give me a moment alone with Zade. What I choose to do with it is up to me. I’m sure Lucian will complain, but he’ll get over it. Maybe.
Zade’s muscular body ripples with his movements, and I drink in every inch of him, from his bright eyes down his abs and to his thick, massive cock. It’s comparable to Dante’s, but his body is more natural where Dante manscapes. It doesn’t bother me any. I honestly don’t care either way.
Zade breaks our staring contest first, and he lowers himself between my legs and kisses my thigh. I squirm at his torturously slow pace as if he’s nervous but also wants to savor every inch of my skin. His eyes dart up to mine, and he smiles. It’s unlike any smile I have ever seen cross his face. He’s usually broody, completely conflicted about everything. But now? It’s as if he finally feels free.
Curling my fingers through the soft strands of his hair, I guide him toward the apex of my legs. He kisses me gently at first, just gliding his tongue over the seam of my body until he uses his fingers to spread me wider and sucks my clit into his mouth. I moan at the sensation, my back arching. Pleasure courses through me, and Zade licks his tongue over and over again like Andre told him to do, working me over in just the right spot to get me to come in a matter of minutes. I tighten my legs around his head, my whole body tensing with my orgasm.
Zade grabs my hands and links our fingers together and just holds onto me through the wave of ecstasy until I release my breath. My chest rises and falls, and he makes his way up my body, licking along my torso until he reaches my nipples and kisses each of them until he finally gets to my mouth.
His body rests between mine, his hard-on pulsing between my legs in anticipation. I know he wants to fuck me already, but he’s holding back just a bit. He’s not one to take initiative. So I know it’s got to be me. He wants me to claim him. To show him what it’s like to be with me.
I reach between us and lace my fingers around his cock, stroking him. His wings flap again, and his whole body lights up with his angelic power. I close the space and kiss him, slipping my tongue over his at the same time that I align his body to mine. He moans, just testing me, teasing me with his tip, and I nip him, stretching his pouty lip with my teeth.
The gesture sets him off, and he thrust into me, the pressure feeling so incredible as my body adjusts to his girth. I shift my leg and stretch it up, opening my body wider for him, and he rests his hands on each side of my head, looking into my eyes as he makes love to me. There’s no other way I can explain it. Zade isn’t like the devils. But he isn’t exactly tame either. His desperation and desire envelop me, and it makes it easy to lose myself with him. My vision lights up as he glows brighter and the purest emotions spill from him to me.
“I want you to treat me as you would one of the devils,” Zade murmurs, his blue eyes sparkling with his angelic glow. “I want to know what it’s like to be with you as they do.”
Damn. It’s as if instead of loving my light, he craves my darkness. It’s completely opposite of what the devils like when it comes to my soul. It almost feels as if Zade loves me at my darkest and not my brightest.
Something comes over me, and I shove him off and climb on top of him, watching his face sharpen with his lust. I realize that he wants me to control him. He wants me to treat him as if he’s not a pure, virginal angel. And I love it. I want to push his boundaries. I want to know what gets his light to dim and his being as dark as mine in this moment.
“Are you sure that’s what you want?” I ask, grabbing his hands and pulling them over his head. “Do you want me to show you how rough I like it? Or how I want to restrain you like all the times I’ve been restrained to have my way with you?”
I hadn’t realized how thrilling it would be to take this kind of power. I don’t know how I manage it, but fire erupts in my palms, and I summon a chain similar to Lucian’s but smaller and just long enough to restrain Zade.
“I told you that I want you to push me. Make me feel as if Heaven abandoned me.” Zade stretches up and grabs me by the hair, bending my neck to the side. He sucks my throat hard enough to leave a mark and set me off.
I use my strength to push him back, and I grab my small fire chain and wind it up around his wrists. He grinds his teeth at the pain, but instead of fighting against it or begging me to take it off, he manages to shift his body, getting me to slide down more until I feel his hard-on smack my ass cheek.
“Tell me how much you want to fuck me,” I say, adjusting my body until I sit on his cock and slide up and down, letting him feel my wetness. “Beg me.”
