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“Come the fuck on, Nat. Are you gonna keep fucking my dad, or are you gonna be my friend?” He takes a gasping breath. “You can’t have it both ways—”
“I’ll go,” Evan says. “You two stay.”
“No!” Cold dread wraps around my heart. I look at Ollie, my best friend, my brother in all the ways that count. Then I look at Evan, my daddy, the man who makes me feel like the most precious gift a person could ask for.
Tears prick my eyes, and I hastily wipe them away.
I love them both. For different reasons, but I love them both so much. These past few weeks, my heart has been filled to the brim and overflowing. Choosing between them is impossible.
“I can’t,” I whisper. “I can’t choose.”
“Can’t or won’t?” Ollie snaps.
“Neither… B-both.” I turn a tearful eye toward Evan. “You both mean too much to me. And I can’t stand to lose either one of you. So I’m not going to choose.”
I start walking.
“Natasha.” Evan reaches for me, but I shake my head and continue past him.
“Where are you going?” Ollie shouts after me. “You’re seriously walking away right now?”
“You said one of us had to leave,” I remind him. “Tonight, it’s going to be me.”
I manage to hold in my sobs until I reach my bedroom. My tears flow freely as I pack an overnight bag with my work laptop and whatever clothes I can stuff inside. Someone knocks on the door the same moment I pull it open, and I nearly run right into Hailey.
“You alright?” she asks, her freckled face streaked with worry. “I heard…well, I don’t know exactly what I heard, but I came to check on you.”
“Thanks.” I sigh, rubbing my cheeks. “I just need to get out of here. Can I stay at your place for a while?”
“Of course.”
Hailey helps me carry my bags outside. Most of the party guests have already scattered like weeds in the wind after the big blow-up. And the ones who are left are all looking at me with either curiosity or contempt.
Evan finds me just as I’m ducking into Hailey’s Camry. He catches the door before I can pull it shut.
“Natasha, please don’t go.”
“I have to, Evan. Your relationship with your son is too important to walk away from. And he’ll never forgive either of us if I choose you.”
“So you’re leaving both of us then. That’s your choice.”
“I’m giving you the chance to finally have that talk with your son.” I take his hand and squeeze it gently. “I don’t know if there’s any hope for the three of us. But I know there’s no fixingusuntil the two of you work through your issues.”
I start to close the car door. Evan catches the frame, holds it open.
“I love you, Natasha.”
My chest tightens as a fresh flood of tears threatens to fall.
“I know you do,” I say. “And you love Ollie, too. But he’s hurting. You’ve been hurting him for years now.”
“You’re right, I have,” he says, his expression torn. “I’m not proud of it. But I don’t want to lose you, Natasha.”
“I don’t want to lose you either. But choosing you would just give Ollie yetanotherreason to hate you. I won’t do that to you.”
A painful understanding passes between us. Evan nods.
“I’ll talk to him,” he says. “I’ll make this right.”
