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“And to tell you I’m sorry.”
She didn’t know what to say, unsure if she even wanted an apology. However, she found her arms loosening, her spine going lax. He reached out his hand as if to curl it around her bicep but stopped midway, his fingers suspended in the air between them.
“I practiced what I was going to say the whole way here, and now that I’m standing in front of you, I’m…” His throat bobbed as he swallowed, and he flickered his gaze from her eyes to her hand. He was looking for permission to touch her.
As her brain wavered back and forth over if she wanted to give it to him or not, her body unwittingly responded by stepping outside into the open-air hall, letting the door close behind her. They were barely two inches apart as he stared down at her.
“With you in front of me, it’s hard to speak,” he said, and she dropped her head so he wouldn’t see how her eyes watered. “Samantha,” he whispered. “I’m so sorry.”
She blinked a few times, clearing her vision, before meeting his gaze again. “I don’t know what you want me to say.”
“You said enough. I just want you to listen. Okay?” He deliberately raised his fingers between them again, offering her an opportunity to stop him. She didn’t, and he rolled a few pieces of hair between his thumb and index finger, studying them as if they were fine strands of gold. After a few moments, he let them drop and took a deep breath, fisting his fingers, as if he was holding on to the feeling of her.
She couldn’t quite grasp the fleeting hope that streaked through her chest…like maybe she wanted him to.
“I sent you that video because it’s the first one in this new series I’m planning. I’m going to do short workout tutorials every week based on questions from people with limb differences. When I started posting photos on Instagram, showing myself lifting with my prosthetic, people left comments and questions. Some of them wanted help. Laney sent me—”
Sam lurched back. “Laney?” Her friend hadn’t mentioned anything about continuing to help Mike. “You’re still talking to Laney?”
“Yeah. She sent me some resources so I could learn how to film and edit my own videos. And Gem—”
“Gem? What the hell?” Her friends were traitors. While they were supposedly plotting Mike’s murder, they were really still chatting with him the whole time.
“As soon as you left, I knew I made a mistake. I never should have let you go.” He shook his head, cringing as if in pain. “But I couldn’t come to you and apologize and tell you how much I love you without doing the work to fix it.”
There it was again. That streak, and Sam blinked. Then blinked again, but he plowed right on.
“After you left, Jimmy sat me down and tore into me.”
She tried to follow along, even stepped closer to him, unconsciously linking her fingers with his, but it was hard to hear around the rushing in her ears. He had said he loved her. She was 90% sure she hadn’t imagined it.
“He basically said I have a hero complex.”
“Hero complex,” she repeated, an involuntary smile crawling across her face. “I don’t think it’s a complex.”
His gaze dipped to their joined hands. “I’ve always been the strong one, the guy in charge, but I lost a sense of myself when I was injured. I thought I had moved past it, but I didn’t realize how much resentment I was still holding on to until you came around. My life looks a lot different than I thought it would, and I was convinced that I couldn’t be the guy you needed.”
“I don’t understand.” She grabbed hold of the hem of his shirt. “Why do you keep saying that? The guy I need. What do you think I need?”
He let out a gruff sound and raised his eyes to hers. They were red-rimmed. “I want to take care of you. I want to protect you. After Bianca—”
She rolled her eyes. “Of course it’s Bianca. That wench.”
Mike stifled a grin, and when he finally tamped it down, he drew their hands up to his chest, towing her even closer. Her leg snuck between both of his, and she could feel the heat radiating off him, even in the humid evening air.
“I didn’t want to lose you, but I let my insecurities get the best of me. You’re the best person I know, and when I say I want to be the man you need, I mean a man who can love you with his whole heart.” He turned her palm so it was flat against his chest. His solid, hard chest, with the rapidly beating heart beneath it. Like her own.
The gaping hole that had been open when she’d left Mike in her rearview mirror was suddenly filled up again. Almost too much. She couldn’t contain it, and when she inhaled, the air stuttered through her lungs until her eyes stung with tears.
Happy tears this time.
“That’s what you need,” he went on. “Someone who’s not afraid to let go and not be in charge. Sometimes I’ll be strong for you, and sometimes you’ll be strong for me. I needed time to remember who I was, figure out how to be confident in myself again.”
“And what do my friends have to do with this?”
He quirked his mouth to the side, stroking his knuckles over her cheek, wiping at the wet tracks there. “It’s too bad none of them have political ambitions because they get shit done. Gem threatened me with bodily harm if I screwed this up, but she did agree to help me out with a couple of my videos. We’re going to partner up to do some yoga for amputees stuff. And Bronte sent me equipment from Chris, a tripod and a GoPro to film. Laney’s got me hooked up on social media.” He lifted one shoulder. “She said she’s going to make me an influencer.”
Sam leaned into him, resting her forehead against his shoulder, inhaling the familiar scent of his soap. “How’s that going so far?”
