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I watch the time tick away, wishing it would go quicker so I could go downstairs for my shift tonight, but instead, I just hear the ticking.
Tick, tick, tick, tick …
So much unsaid in that silence, but I can't understand what. I know I want Riley, that much is clear after last night, but I also know that I can never go there. And yet, I am still here, forced to live with him and pretend like I don’t want him, like I’m not scared of how well he sees me. He sees what others don’t so easily, and I’m scared and unsure of who I am and what to do. I could save some money and go live somewhere else, but if I’m honest, a part of me doesn’t want to leave.
I guess I’m a glutton for punishment, I think to myself on a sad sigh when the clock hits three o’clock.
Running my fingers through my hair, feeling the tension in my shoulders as I rise from my bed, I decide that I’ve waited enough. Still, with another hour and a half before my shift, I make the decision that time down there may be better than waiting up here.
Riley is there when I leave my bedroom, sitting at the round table near the kitchen, scrolling through his phone, dressed in a pair of sweats and a blue shirt and even making that look good.
His eyes meet mine as I stop just outside the hallway, looking like a deer in headlights as I pull a hoodie on, zipping it up, and he asks with a furrowed brow, “Where you going?”
I nod towards the door. “Work. I’m on tonight.”
I’m making my way towards the door, tucking my keys in the back pocket of my jeans, when he rises from his seat, a question in his eyes. “I know, but you don’t start for another hour and a half.”
I stop just as I reach for the door, so exposed and caught out in a lie as I feel the weight of his eyes on me. I turn to face him, schooling my features as I say, “Yeah, but Danny told me that he might run through some more training with me before I start. We all know I need it.” I finish with a half-hearted chuckle, and he just stares at me, his brows furrowed and his eyes looking into mine, like he can see everything, and my heart starts to race.
Just when I think he’s gonna call me out on my lie, he purses his lips and gives me a nod. “Alright. I don’t think you’re that bad, but if it makes you feel better, good luck.”
I give him a tight smile before practically running out the door, closing it behind me and standing there for a moment to catch my breath and slow my heart rate.
What is this guy doing to me?
Knowing the answer to that question won’t be coming any time soon, I force my legs to move and carry me down the stairs to the bar. When I reach the top of the stairs, I smile to myself at the soft music of the jukebox playing, combined with the familiar smell of alcohol.
I descend the stairs, taking in the clean bar, which will be demolished by the end of the night by smashed beer bottles, food and drinks spilled on the floor, and maybe a chair or two broken by drunken idiots. I look behind the bar and see Danny dressed in his usual button-down and khaki pants, dancing to the unfamiliar song playing throughout the bar, swaying his hips in what looks like a salsa dance. My smile grows as I watch him move about the bar, from one end to the register, popping it open with a flourish before jumping in surprise at seeing me standing at the bar entry.
“Oh!” He stops dancing instantly, focusing on the register before laughing as a blush takes over his entire face. “I’m sorry, kid, I didn’t see you there.”
“You dance?” I ask with a playful lilt to my voice as I approach him.
With money in his hands, he stops counting, his eyes turning sad. “I used to. Once upon a time.”
My mind flashes back to the stories the boys had told me earlier about Danny and his wife, how she got sick and how this was their place, how he kept it going for her. “With your wife?”
He stops counting again, putting the money down before looking at me, with sadness still there, but a forced smile appears. “Yeah. She loved dancing. When we first met, I couldn’t dance to save my life, so before our wedding, I took lessons, and we had our first dance.” He thinks for a moment, remembering, and smiles to himself, “You should have seen her face, that smile. That smile had me on my knees the first time I saw it.”
He shakes his head to himself as he places the money back, and my heart warms at the love coming off this man as he speaks about his wife. I have never seen my father speak about my mom like this, nor have I had a man do this for me. I’m not so sure it’s a thing now.
A sadness takes over at that idea when he asks, “What about you? Any special man?”
I look at him and want to laugh and cry at the same time, but instead, I just roll my eyes at his fatherly smile. “Nope. I don’t think any man is gonna dance for me.”
That elicits a gentle laugh from Danny as he proceeds to shake his head. “Judging by how many men have been coming in here since you started working here, I’d say you have your pick.”
I give him a look. “Yeah, I see them, Danny, but I also know what they want, and we don’t want the same thing.”
Understanding registers quickly as he nods slowly. “Ah, I see.” He gives me a long look, and I give him a tight smile and a shrug because what can you do? You can cry about it all you want, but it won’t change anything.
I’m so lost in my own self-pity that I’m surprised when Danny suddenly puts a hand on my shoulder and gives it a gentle squeeze with a caring look on his face, a look I had wished my father had given me once in a while, but he never did. “Don’t give up, kid. Every woman is surrounded by frogs.”
I give a small smile, raising a brow. “Let me guess, someday my prince will come?”
Danny laughs at my smart remark, raising his hand and ruffling my already messy hair. “Wise ass.”
I laugh, swatting away at his hand in my hair. “Sorry, Danny, but this is real life. Prince Charming doesn’t come in on a white horse to save the damsel in distress in real life.”
