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They were ready for us. Times had changed from this time last year, when we existed as background music. This time, we had fans calling our name.
We were hired to play mostly covers, but we mixed in a lot of our original material too. My mind was blown when the audience sang along tooursongs. I mean, it had happened—a lot lately—but this was our hometown crowd.
My eye caught Tali’s blonde wig as she danced to our music with Tino and Nina. I almost forgot the lyrics to a song I’d sung a thousand times when she looked up, locking eyes, and bit her lip. She mouthed, “I love you,” and I couldn’t wipe the cheesy smile off my face.
I had to tear my eyes away so I didn’t keep stumbling over my words, but I kept finding her in the crowd, dancing and drinking. The last time I swept the crowd, toward the end of my set, I almost missed her. Her head was bent, and she’d stopped dancing. Another girl was speaking to her in her ear, Tali listening intently. When Tali raised her head and I got a look at the other girl, I knew I was fucked.
My gut churned with all the shit I should have told Tali but hadn’t. All I wanted to do was leap off the stage and do damage control. If she’d left, I would have. But she stayed. With her back turned to me, yeah, but she didn’t leave.
As soon as I our set was over, I stashed my guitar and ran like my feet had wings to find my girl. A couple people tried to stop me to talk, congratulate me on the show, but all I had to give was a polite smile.
She was perched on a bar stool, surrounded by Ben, Tino, Nina and Heather...and Laura.
“Stripes.”
Slowly, she turned in my direction. Her eyes were shiny, and some of her lipstick had been chewed off. She was a picture of beauty and sadness.
I held out my hand. “Come here. Let’s talk.”
Her friends closed ranks around her, and I had a feeling if she’d said she didn’t want to see me, they’d have blocked me from her, no matter how hard I fought.
She stood, sighing. “It’s fine. I’m fine, guys.”
The hand I placed on the small of her back caused her to stiffen.
“Please don’t right now, Jude.”
We went backstage, where we’d been all over each other an hour and a half ago. Now she looked at me like she didn’t know me.
“You promised,” she said hoarsely. “You said you’d tell me the truth, even if I didn’t like it.”
“What’d Laura say?”
She shook her head violently, blonde wig slapping her cheeks. “No. I want to hear it from you.Youtell me the truth.”
I scrubbed my sweaty face with the heel of my hand, heaving a sigh. “We slept together a year ago. Before you and I were together.”
“That’s it?” she asked.
“It went on for a while. I guess, off and on the year before that. Before I even knew you existed, Tali. It was never anything serious. Just sex. Mostly when we were really fucking wasted.”
Her arms wrapped around her middle. “I saw her tonight, for the first time in a while. So of course I asked her why I hadn’t seen her in so long. I wasn’t expecting her to say it was too awkward hanging out with the dude she had a year-long sexual relationship with who dropped her without explanation. Can you imagine how she felt when she came to my birthday and saw us together?”
“It was never like that with us. There was never gonna be some big break-up scene. I’d told her I met someone, and that was it.”
Tali’s eyes narrowed, mouth thinned. “Then why did you tell Laura not to tell me? Why didn’tyoutell me?”
“’Cause I was stupid. I thought you might use my history with Laura as a reason not to be with me. I love you so much, Stripes. I’ve been nothing but honest with you since we’ve been together. If you want me to write a list of every girl I’ve ever fucked, I’ll do that. Anything you want, I’ll do it.”
I knew it was the wrong thing to say the second it left my mouth, but I was feelin’ desperate and kinda angry. Most of my anger was directed squarely at myself, but I had to admit, some of it was directed at Tali. If she didn’t understand how utterly devoted to her I was, I didn’t know how to convince her.
She pushed my chest with both hands. “Don’t you dare try to gaslight me. You’re not going to turn this into ‘Oh, Tali’s overreacting about my sordid past that means nothing.’ You purposely deceived me for your own gain.” She pushed me again. “You broke your promise to me.”
I caught her wrists when she went to push me a third time. “And I’m really fucking sorry. I hate that my stupid choices have messed up your night. But now that we’re laying it all on the table, are you always forthcoming with me, Tals?”
She squirmed but didn’t really fight my hold on her. “Of course I am.”
“Except you failed to mention Ben had moved in with you until I got back and saw his empty room with my own eyes. And Tino told me an interesting story about being hospitalized.”
