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Stassi: Never mind.
Me: Stass, what do you mean?
Stassi: Do you want me to come home?
Me: I want you to stay with Kate. I know you’ve missed her.
Stassi: Not as much as I miss other things
I can already tell this is a dangerous road that I’m starting down.Stop it now, Dominic. Shut it down.
Me: How much have you smoked?
Stassi: I’m not high!
Me: Lies.
Stassi: I’m not, I swear. I would never lie to you.
Me: Me neither. Even if you may not like what I have to say, I’m trying my best to behonest.
Stassi: Brutally so it seems.
Me: I wasn’t trying to be brutal
I want to say so much more, but via text message was not the right time.
Me: I don’t regret it, Stass.
Stassi: I know you don’t. I saw the way you looked at me while you were inside me. The way you held me. The way you kissed me. You may have fucked me but you also made love to me.
The words. The very incriminating words are now in print and on my cell phone and hers too.
Me: Stassi, you can’t text me like that.
Stassi: Shit, sorry. I deleted it.
I breathe a sigh of relief in hopes that maybe she really does realize her mistake and that putting something like that in print could destroy us both. I delete the text message as well but decide to respond in a way that she would know what I’m talking about, but no one else would if they happened to stumble onto these messages.
Me: But…I am glad that you realize that. That you realize that my anger earlier was just that. Anger. But at myself. So, I’m sorry for taking it out on you, Stass.
Stassi: It’s okay
Me: It’s not.
Stassi: You’re right, it’s not. But I forgive you anyway. Night. xxx
I stare at the x’s on the screen for longer than I care to admit, wishing those were real kisses pressed against my lips. My cock practically screams for me to touch it or stroke it as I picture my stepdaughter’s sweet face, but I can’t.
I can’t allow myself to have her in any way, even if it’s only in my mind.
I’d tasted the forbidden fruit, and my God, was it sweet, but I fear taking another bite, another lick, another suck would be nothing but poisonous.
It’s been a week since we got back from Charleston and Dominic and I are moving around each other like polite roommates. I half expected something to come about from the texting while I was slightly tipsy off of this strawberry vodka drink that Kate made me, but the next morning he’d just kissed my forehead and said he was glad I was home. I honestly am not sure what I wanted. I’m not sure what I want next week or next month or next year. I’m not looking for a husband or a boyfriend or even Mr. Right. I do know I’m looking for an orgasm that only my stepfather can give. I want more of that. I want to explore so much more with him.
He’d told me that he was going to claim every inch of me when we were in Charleston and while he did with his mouth, there was still one hole that he hadn’t claimed with his dick, and though I knew it would be even more painful than losing my virginity, I wanted it because I knew it would be amazing just like all of the other experiences we’d shared. I’m fantasizing about the weekend in Charleston for perhaps the millionth time when my phone begins to ring.
I’m surprised that Carter has been calling, especially after the last time we met was far from friendly, and yet I’m getting texts and calls and voicemails.
