AllFreeNovel
Share Us
She fumbled for her bonnet, which he gently took from her hands before she could put it on and cover her beautiful dark hair. “I didn’t realize I was so tired, but it seemed the minute I sat down . . .”
“This place has that effect.”
“It’s your oak tree, isn’t it? The one in the painting. I knew when I saw it.”
“Yes.”
“The painting is lovely; you did a wonderful job.” She yawned. “It was quite a hike to get here, which must account for my sleepiness—although Alex and I have been rather busy the past few days too, not to mention the long ride in the carriage that brought us here. Mary showed me the way—to the tree, naturally, not the manor.” She was being her typical, Louisa-like self upon awakening, overflowing with words as usual, but her eyes betrayed her worry about his arrival at Farleigh Manor.
The time had come.
“Louisa, there is something I must say to you,” he said.
She took a deep breath. “Before you do, William, there is something I must say first. Please don’t be angry with Alex for bringing me here uninvited. It was my idea—”
William placed his fingers on her lips to silence her words. “Shh,” he said gently. “I am not angry. I am ashamed.”
Before he could continue, she took hold of his hand and removed it from her lips, clasping it in both of her hands. “But there is no need to be ashamed,” she said earnestly. “Farleigh Manor is special. Oh, it’s definitely in need of repair, but that can be remedied once we hire more servants, and I don’t entirely know what Alex has learned from his inquiries into the home farms—he and Matthew are working together right now on that very thing—but I’m sure—”
“Louisa,” William said, interrupting her, loving her even more for her hopeful outlook. “My dear.”
“I’m talking too much again, aren’t I?”
“Not at all. But I’m afraid what I have to say cannot wait.” He must speak before he lost the will to do so.
He rose to his feet and walked a few paces away, bracing himself before turning to face her. “My shame isn’t because of the condition of Farleigh Manor. It is because in blaming my father for it, valid as it may have been to do so, I took my own actions too far by using the vowel to force you into marriage. I convinced myself it was necessary––a connection that would provide a means of rectifying the situation here as well as the debts my father accumulated. It was unforgivable of me. But my sins are worse than even that. You asked me to be honest and forthcoming with you, and I failed. And when Miss Purnell—”
“William,” she said, but he held up his hand to stop her from speaking. He had to finish what he’d come to say.
“I had to do something, don’t you see?” he asked. “My father—”
“William,” she interrupted again. “I thought she was your mistress.”
“My . . . what?” he sputtered.
“Lord Kerridge told Alex he saw you with Miss Purnell. He watched you get into a carriage with her. It seemed the likeliest conclusion; he and Alex both assumed—”
William groaned.
“I had to know for myself, William. I didn’t have the luxury of time to wait for you to tell me, and I wasn’t sure what you would say if I confronted you. It was time for me to get the answers I needed on my own since the last of the banns are to be read this Sunday. You see that, don’t you?”
“You thought I had a mistress,” he said more to himself, really, than to her. He nearly laughed at the absurdity of it, except that it wasn’t funny in the least.
He looked her straight in her eye. “Louisa, my whole life, I watched my mother waste away from my father’s abuses and infidelities. She died well before her time. And then less than a week ago, I learned that my father had treated another woman with the same selfish disregard—and that he had fathered children by her. Peter is almost the age I was when my father sent me off to school, and Daisy is a sweet little thing who deserves to be brought up with family who loves her and treats her with respect—as you yourself were loved and treated by your family. I want Miss Purnell to know that my brother and sister will not suffer from my father’s misdeeds, that they will have the happy childhood I was never allowed. I will never, never do to my family what my father did to both of his.”
“I wanted to believe this of you, William. I think I already knew, but I had to be sure,” Louisa said, her deep-blue eyes dark and earnest.
“When Mr. Heslop first showed me the vowel, it seemed a rational and justifiable plan. But it became less supportable the more I got to know you.” He longed to tell her that he loved her, but it would be unfair to weigh her down with that confession now. “It was utterly wrong of me to assume I could hold you to this. I cannot in good conscience burden you with marriage to me and to life at Farleigh Manor and all the struggles that will entail. They were not of your doing.”
He reached into his breast pocket and retrieved the vowel.
* * *
Louisa watched, stunned, as William held the vowel he’d taken from the breast pocket of his coat, after having just listened to him string more words together at one time than all the other times he’d spoken to her combined. And with a surprising bit of theatrical bravado that was completely out of character for him, he held up the vowel and tore it in half and then in half again and again until there were only small squares of paper left. And then he knelt before her on one knee and held the squares of paper out to her in offering, looking for all the world as if he were about to propose in earnest.
How ironic that his romantic gesture was intended to end their betrothal.
“I shall leave at first light for London to inform your father and mother of the change of plans and to offer my deepest apologies. I am to blame, and I will do everything in my power to make things right for you,” he said. He looked at her with heartbreaking tenderness before dropping his gaze. “I will take my leave of you now, unless you would like my escort back to the house.”
