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“What else?”
“That means I have to leave you and my grandfather here alone,” he admitted. I snorted.
“Is that it?” I asked with a chuckle. “You’ll fuck me but won’t leave me in your home? I’ve been here before, Leven.”
“That’s not it,” he argued, though from how uncomfortable he was, that was exactly it.
“Listen. I’ve proven myself to you and I’m not running. I’ll keep Garren safe while you’re gone, make sure he eats, the whole nine yards,” I promised, putting every ounce of sincerity in my voice that I could. It was a true test to him, to see if he’d ever let go of this rivalry with me, if I could ever let my guard down.
“Who will protect you?” he challenged, stunning me into silence.
“I’ve protected myself for a long time,” I told him evenly. “And we have the gates here, a guard at that same gate. We’ll be safe here.”
“All right,” he relented. “I’ll leave our numbers here.” He scribbled them out before leaving the room, casting me one last unreadable glance before disappearing.
“You’re the only one I’ve ever seen tame that man,” Garren joked. I looked up, relieved to see that Leven was right, he looked like a new man.
“Hardly,” I disagreed. “He’s still uncertain, but that’s all right. However, it looks like it’s you and me today. What sounds good for dinner?”
He thought it over and I loved that he knew I wanted a real response. “How are you with fried chicken? Leven won’t let me have any of that stuff.”
“Sold.” I grinned. “I’ll go see what I can grab from the mess hall when I deliver this to Emma.”
“I’m looking forward to it. For now I think I’m going to go back to planting,” he said, grabbing a coat off the hook and sliding it on and disappearing outside. Once I had the cake cooling, I went outside to join Garren. He was working over one of the raised flower beds, so I started tilling the others to save him some work.
“Gloves are here,” he said. “Leven grabbed you a pair.” Smiling to myself, I pulled on the smallest pair. They fit perfectly and made my job a whole lot easier. “So tell me, what is your plan once your probation is over?”
“I’m not sure,” I admitted. “Find a job? Get a place? See if my truck is fixed yet?”
“Leven mentioned your truck, I hear Dave is having a field day with it.” He chuckled. “He’s an honest mechanic at least.”
“I wouldn’t trust my truck with just anyone,” I agreed. “He’s been great, and I can spot a liar from a mile away.”
“That’s an important skill to have on your own,” Garren smiled sagely. “Who gave you the truck?”
“My dad. He loved that old thing, rebuilt the engine and all. It sat for years after he died so I fixed up what I could when I was old enough,” I said, imagining that smile I’d missed for far too many years. Usually I hated talking about my family but words came easily when I was talking to Garren. “Mom thought I was crazy, that it was a lost cause. But sometimes it feels like all I have left of him. Then I lost her and more recently my sister and I realize it’s all just material things, not anything to do with them. But I still can’t let her go.”
“I still wear this,” Garren said, pulling a necklace out from under his shirt. Two rings hung from the thick chain, along with a locket. “It feels like I still have a piece of her. We all grieve our own ways.”
“Yeah, my pack didn’t really get that,” I sighed. “Imagine punishing a grieving girl.” The bitterness in my tone had him walking over, forcing me to come sit next to him on the porch.
“How bad?” he asked gently. It wasn’t just mere curiosity but understanding. He seemed to understand that I finally needed an outlet for my past. For some reason I didn’t want to keep it in, Garren was quickly becoming my safe space.
Not giving a verbal answer, I slid my sweater off my shoulder, exposing one of many clawed scars down my back. His intake of breath was startled, shaky.
“They didn’t allow me to heal afterward, I was banned from shifting until scarring was assured,” I said. “It got better when the old alpha retired, but I get to carry those lovely memories with me.”
“No wonder you’re hesitant to be part of a pack.” He gave me a side hug, pulling me close and holding me for a second. It left me feeling vulnerable and tears threatened to fall, but I fought them back.
“Yeah, me and packs don’t have the best track record. I was too rebellious apparently, though I hardly think anything I did warranted the punishment. I was the scapegoat, the scary story to tell young wolves to keep them in line.”
“Those alphas are the exact reason we stayed nomadic for so long. Wolves need a pack they can trust more than they need a place to settle down,” he said. “But now you’re at a crossroads, making decisions for your life. If you chose to leave, they’d let you go.”
“Would they?” I mused. “I think there’d be a bit of a fight now.”
“Yes, but Callum respects our autonomy, and that includes yours,” he said, tapping my leg with his gloves before getting up and leaving me to my thoughts. But that was the last thing I wanted to be lost in, so I went back in to finish decorating the cake, finishing the frosting Leven had started.
When it was finished, I stepped out to check on Garren, only to find him chatting with Nyx. I walked outside to join them, worried something might have happened already.
