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Chapter Thirty-three
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THAD
I shouldn’t be here. I shouldn’t be kissing her. Tasting her. Running my hands up her arms to feel the way her flesh prickles beneath my touch.
I shouldn’t do a lot of things...
One look at her and all the memories came back. Her laugh, her smile, the way she says my name as I move inside of her. I’m desperate to hear it again. The little whimpers and cries. The way she comes alive beneath me.
It’s all I can see. All I can feel. All I can focus on. I need to feel her. It’s the only thought I have.
I’ve been living in my own form of hell for months. Struggling between two addictions. Her and one that will erase her and everything right along with her.
“Thad,” she whispers against my lips prompting me to kiss her harder and deeper.
Fuck she feels so good. Too good. Too perfect. It’s the exact high I was expecting. The high I’ve spent countless days trying to resist.
I thought I was doing good. I thought I was getting by okay. Damn was I wrong. One look at her and it was like someone had prepped the needle and stuck it in my arm. There was no way I could turn away.
“I want you.” I grab the hem of her shirt, pulling away long enough to peel the material over her head before my mouth is back on hers. “I need you,” I murmur against her lips.
“I need you too.” She moans, sliding my button down off my shoulders before helping me out of the t-shirt underneath.
I back her to the mattress, easing her down before making quick work of her pants. I’m barely able to suppress the groan that builds in my throat when she lifts her hips and slides her panties off, tossing them somewhere behind me.
I have my pants and boxers off in a flash, climbing on top of her like the room is on fire and she’s my only salvation. I don’t bother with a condom, not that I have one, but I know she’s on birth control. Thank god she is, because even if she weren’t I’m not sure that would stop me right now. I want to feel her bare. No, Ineedto feel her bare.
I wish I could take my time. I wish I could control the hunger blinding me but I can’t. I line myself at her entrance and plow inside with so much force she cries out before clamping her teeth down onto my shoulder.
Her reaction spurs me on even more and before I know it I’m slamming into her over and over, driving us both further up the mattress.
“Thad.” She reaches for my face, forcing my gaze to hers. “Look at me,” she pleads, something desperate in her eyes.
I can’t do what she asks. I can’t look at her. I can’t let her back in. It’s just a fix, I tell myself. Just one time and I’ll walk away. Just one small hit to ease the ache. Just one...
