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CHAPTER16
Tati
I couldn’t decideif I wanted it to be real or not.
In some ways, it was all so messed up I wished it—it being current reality—was just some intense fever dream, something I could wake up from and have it all disappear.
In other ways though, I knew I should be grateful for how it all panned out, knew that even with the lives lost, the grieving we had to do… it was over now.
We finally hit the end.
So… I guess there it was.
There was no point in indulging fantasy, when the reality was staring me right in my face—the loss of life, the trauma, all these things that could never be taken back.
But at least it’s over, I reminded myself.
Finallyover.
At least there was that.
Nobody really wanted me at home by myself in the period following my concussion, but I had insisted on it, three days after everything had gone down. Unlike the last time I insisted on being back in my own space with so much shit still up in the air, there was no longer any danger lurking in the dark.
None we knew of, at least.
It made me feel… restless.
Even more than I’d been before, somehow.
Onyx had been there when I woke up from being knocked unconscious, had stayed around to make sure I was okay, and then… he was gone.
I had not seen or heard from him since.
Istilldidn’t really know exactly what had gone down in Renard’s house. I just knew one moment I was sneaking in one side while Margeaux snuck in the other, and the next… I was coming back to consciousness at the clubhouse.
Everything between was a blur.
The only insight I had was what Onyx had related to Brandon, who in turn shared it with me.
Renard was dead and Onyx had survived it.
I guess that was all really that truly mattered. It was definitely all he was willing to discuss and I had a feeling his aversion to talk factored heavily in his absence.
I couldn’t make him do what he didn’t want to do though.
In the meantime, like I said…the restlessness ruled me.
WithBottomsclosed down yet again, the dispensary project dead in the water, there wasn’t much for me to do. Everything else, we’d either pumped the brakes on for now, or was something that was just hands off.
So in the face of ennui creeping in with the grief, I couldn’t let the shit get too out of hand.
I did what I always did to get something non-destructive occupying my mind.
I decided to buy a bike.
When I walked intoHamilton Luxury Transport, the first thing I noticed was that security was much more visible than the last time I’d been there. They’d alwayshadsecurity due to the nature of their business, but I had to assume the increased presence was because of Brandon’s need to keep Nessa protected.
It was no surprise.
