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In unison, they both say, "Gianna wait," but I'm done waiting. My heart is broken, my soul is shattered, and I just want to go home. I need to get away from both of them.
I'm frantic to put distance between them and me. I can't win in this situation. I lose all around. I either lose my heart, the boy who picked up the pieces of me and put me back together more times than I can count, or I lose the man who has awakened parts of me I didn't know existed.
August ignited a flame deep inside of me that burns for him. Every piece of me hungers for him. From the minute our eyes locked for the first time, I was gone. He owned me whether I wanted it or not. We had an instant, undeniable chemistry. The only problem is I don't know how much of that rings true for him. As reckless as these feelings for him are, I can’t ignore them. I feel like some lovesick teenager crushing on the first man she had sex with when in reality, he's just not that into me.
Suddenly, my chest feels tight, my eyesight gets blurry, and I feel like I might faint. Putting my hands on my knees, I take deep breaths trying to pull air into my lungs.
Then Mason's there on his knees in front of me, hands cradling my face. "Babe, look at me. I need you to calm down and breathe. I'm here, it's okay. We're going to be okay."
Suddenly he’s lying on the ground, and August is hovering above him, ready to strike. Then everything goes black.
I'minacarwhen I wake up but not the right car. I can't avoid the tear that escapes and rolls down my cheek. August glances over at me and does a double-take before pulling the car over.
"You're awake. Please don't cry, baby."
That's when the dam breaks. I can't help it. Tonight, has been an emotional roller coaster with way too many ups and downs, and as much as I want to hold my shit together and not let August see me cry, the truth is I want him to hold me again.
No sooner than the thought passes he's out of the car, opening my door and pulling me into his arms. I let him hold me and his woodsy scent quickly engulfs my senses wrapping around me like a warm blanket, calming my racing heart. Our embrace is short because he pulls back to place his hands on my cheeks and wipe away my tears.
"Sit. I have snacks for you."
Snacks, how does he know I need snacks? I haven't had a fainting episode in a while, but he wouldn't know about my blood sugar issues. He opens the back door and pulls out a bag full of snacks and a Dr. Pepper.
"I know you drink diet soda, but you need the sugar and calories after tonight."
My face flames with heat. Is he referring to our sex? Does he think I fainted because he wore me out? I drop my face to my lap to avoid his gaze, but that doesn't work for him. He grabs my chin and forces me to meet his eyes.
"I told you not to hide from me." His eyes search mine as if he is trying to read my mind. Finally, they settle on my mouth, and he says, "Mason told me what to do before he got in his car a drove off."
I try, I really do, but the tears sting the back of my eyes and fall anyway. I hang my head in shame. I shouldn't have asked Mason to pick me up, and then he wouldn't have been hurt once again.
"Baby, I really need you to stop crying. My nerves are shot, and I need my girl back."
His hands now grip the fabric of my pants as he puts his head in my lap. This beautiful man is acting as if I mean something to him. Gently I run my fingers through his hair, watching as his shoulders slightly relax at my touch. My stomach chooses that moment to growl. He looks up at me and scolds, “Eat!” Clearly agitated.
I nod in agreement and open the bag of snacks finding a soft-baked macadamia nut cookie inside, my favorite. I take a bite and moan at how good it tastes. August is still standing outside the car door, watching me eat. I know I shouldn't want him right now, given the events of the last few hours, but he's completely ensnared me. I'm trapped, and I don't want to get free. I want whatever attention he'll give me, and I know that sounds incredibly pathetic.
Trying my best to play it somewhat cool and not look like a complete lovesick fool, I reach for my soda and take a huge drink, trying to act casual.
Once he's satisfied, I ate enough and won't pass out. He says, "I'm sorry I should have fed you." My posture slumps with defeat.
Damn, that's what he's sorry for? Out of all the things that have happened tonight, he's sorry he didn't feed me. That's when I realize I need to stop hoping that he'll want me the way I want him. I need to bury my emotions that are screaming for him to keep me, and the only way I know to do that is by pushing him away.
"Can you please just take me home now?"
I turn and tuck myself into the car. He stands there for a minute, burning holes into the side of my head with his gaze before closing the door.
Once he gets in the car, I steal a glance at his hands gripping the steering wheel and notice his knuckles are trashed as if he got in a fight.
Oh god, that's when I remember the moment before I passed out. Mason was in front of me, and August knocked him back. Oh no, is Mason okay? Why couldn't he just let Mason take me home? I take out my phone to see if Mason has texted or called. He texted.
Mason: Let me know when you get home.
Glancing over at August, I can tell he just read my text and who it was from as his knuckles are now gripped so tight on the wheel, they're white.
"Did you hurt him?"
He looks over at me and shakes his head. "No, I didn't touch him." I can see the look of disgust written across his face like he wants to say more, but he's holding back.
