Page 47 of Say It's Me

"Is this about staying at your parents' house? Because if I’m being honest, I would rather not. Your dad said terrible things to me that day at the hospital. I don't expect an apology by any means. Hell, part of me doesn't blame him. If Elio got caught up in that same type of mess because of some girl, I'm not sure I could grant any grace either. But add in the fact that they blame me for you leaving the company, and it all just makes me really uncomfortable."

He rolls his eyes and lays his head back on the concrete surround, clearly perturbed.

"Are you serious? I knew you didn't want to stay there, and you've been biting your tongue for the past week. Baby, if you don't want to stay there, we don't have to. I did want to show you the property though. It was my grandfather's place, and I grew up going there. I have lots of good memories in that house. Out of all the people in my life, surprisingly, I think my grandfather understood my desire to strike out on my own path. We were close, and I think he knew the family legacy wasn't mine to uphold.” He splashes water on his face and runs his hands through his hair. Whenever his parents are brought up, it instantly makes him anxious.

The relationship he has with his parents has always been strained, but now that he’s with me, it's worse. They are cordial at best when I see them, but I know they blame me for August leaving the company. It doesn’t matter how much he has told them his departure had nothing to do with me, they don’t buy it. But I hate being the reason he doesn’t see his family regularly. I wouldn’t wish that on anyone.

I stay silent, regretting my decision to broach this topic. I’m obviously striking out tonight. Both subjects I brought up were not what August had in mind, and I’m starting to feel like I’ve put a damper on the evening in a major way. August must see the apology in my expression because his eyes soften before he comes over to pull me into his arms.

“Baby, don’t do that. I’m sorry that the topic of my parents always gets me so riled up, but what I need you to understand is that I was like this before you. Stop blaming yourself for this mess. You live in the house I bought and kept secret for years because I knew, one day, I would stop being their trophy son and start living for myself. You may have been the catalyst that brought that change on, but it was inevitable. I think things are going to change and they’re going to come around sooner rather than later.”

Releasing me from his hold he brings my arms up and places them around his neck before placing a kiss on my forehead. When I look up to meet his gaze, he quickly averts his eyes. He is acting so strange, and for the life of me I can’t figure it out. I casually start raking my fingers through the hairs at the base of his neck, a move I know he loves, which earns me a half-smile before he pulls me with him to a seated position that has me straddling his lap, making me all too happy to oblige. When his eyes find mine, I can tell he has more to say, but the words aren’t coming easily to him, which is new, even for August.

“Gigi, I spent the better part of my life trying to be someone I wasn't, but I never lost hope that one day I would be able to lead the life I wanted to live. That's what drew me to you. I saw that same fire in your eyes the day I met you. You knew what you wanted, but you wore a mask. The same mask I wore. You didn’t want the world to see the real you because there was no way they’d understand. I know this because it’s the same way I’ve always felt. How could anyone relate to a rich boy not wanting money and legacy handed to him? For you, it was how could anyone see past your circumstance and not believe you to be a product of your environment? You only let people see what you wanted them to see, and I saw myself reflected in that. I knew then that I had to have you."

His words resonate deep within my heart because I've always felt that my soul recognized him before I did. He knew me best before he ever met me.

"Since you decided to throw in the last few words about how you had to have me, I suppose I can suffer in silence and go to your parents’ house if it makes you happy." I place a kiss on his forehead, his nose, and finally his mouth. He briefly lets me tease apart his lips and dip my tongue in to taunt his before he places a hand on my chest and pulls away. I'm starting to feel self-conscious here. No amount of seduction is working on him tonight. I mean, I am straddling the man’s lap in a thong bikini for crying out loud.

"Gianna, as much as I love playing happy family with Ethan, this is our first trip together, and I would rather have you all to myself. We don't have to stay at my parent's house if it bothers you that much. We can stay wherever you want." Now his hands are lazily playing with the band of my bikini bottoms, and I know I need to get this next part out before I lose my ability to think.

"August, I have never given you any reason to believe I enjoy being around your parents. In fact, anytime we meet with them, someone goes out of their way to please me beforehand, but I’ll do it if you think it will make things better."

He knows I have mixed feelings about his parents, or anyone from his world. They're all a bunch of imposters. There is usually some sort of disagreement involving me ignoring him, only to end up writhing beneath him in complete ecstasy for long hours after that.

"Baby, if you want me to fuck you, all you need to do is say so. I realize you have an insatiable appetite, where falling asleep with my cock deep inside you and waking up with my mouth on your pussy could be considered less than sufficient, but we don't need to make up reasons to fight just to get laid. I'm more than happy to put in extra hours during the day." I can't help but roll my eyes. He knows he's being facetious.

I can't help but shake my head at his antics, but when he starts playing with my bottoms again and brings his lips to my shoulder, my focus quickly reverts. Wrapping my arms around his head, I hold him against my chest. Holding him brings me a type of comfort I've never felt, and because I know it does the same for him, he lets me. For long moments, we stay immersed in a tender embrace. Wrapped in his arms, all noise fades away, and it feels like only he and I exist. I could let him hold me for hours, and when we're not doing other things between the sheets, that's precisely what he does.

"Gianna, look at me, baby."

When I finally let go and pull back to meet his gaze, his eyes are soft, but there's something else there that I can't quite place.

"This night has gone in the complete opposite direction of what I had planned. First, you came out wearing the sexiest fucking swimsuit I've ever seen, pissing me off and turning me on all at once, then you started talking about another man and my parents. All topics I didn't care to discuss, but I listened anyway because I will always listen to you baby. I want to know what's on your mind and in your soul so that I can know your heart. You're everything to me Gigi and—"

I cut him off before he can get another word in. There is nothing more this man needs to say. I love him with all that I am. I rob him of his voice and breath as I steal his mouth. This time when my lips meet his, he lets me in without reserve, and I aim to show him with my kiss what my heart has known all along. He is mine. August thinks he doesn't know my heart, but that couldn't be further from the truth because all along, he's trusted it without knowing. He did as I requested whenever I asked anything of him, even when it pained him. He gave me what I demanded because he knew what I needed and trusted that my word was enough. The words of others were weightless until him. With him, I find myself hanging on every word and trusting with my whole heart that every one is true.

Running one hand through his hair, I pull him ever closer to me as I try to deepen our kiss. My tongue sweeps against his in long, slow, tantalizing strokes, and it doesn't take long before I feel him harden beneath me. I show him how pleased I am with his response to me by grinding my clit against his length. A groan of pleasure rumbles from deep within his chest as he finally grabs my ass hard in appreciation. Finally, my man is going to have his way with me, but right when I think I've got him where I want him, he pulls back.

"Gigi, please just—" he's really struggling now, and I feel bad for not understanding what's happening. This nervous side is new to me. Fiddling with the crisscross of my top, his eyes finally find mine before he says, "Baby, I love you so much. I've been trying to tell you all night that I want to spend the rest of my life making you the happiest woman in the world. I want to go to bed with you in my arms every night so that you're the first face I see every morning. I want you to promise to be my forever, I need you to be my forever, Gigi."

His eyes are searching mine for what feels like an answer. Suddenly the set-up, his behavior, and his confession all make sense. My eyes go wide, and I'm rendered speechless.

August

Fourteen

Ayearago,Ifelt like my life would forever be endless obligations, infinite misery living a life that wasn’t mine, and unrelenting fake relationships. Then she walked into my life. The day I met Gianna was when I suddenly had a purpose outside the life I was predestined to live. I wouldn’t call what we had love at first sight, but a part of her soul called to mine, and I knew I couldn’t stay away. Being near, touching, and having her became as necessary as breathing air.

My entire life has been filled with expectations, the role I needed to fill, the people I needed to please, and the woman I should marry. I didn’t want any of it, and I became resentful and jaded. I didn’t appreciate what I had because I was forced to be someone I wasn’t. Ethan told me the root of his issue with me was that I was always so ungrateful for everything I had. My answer was that the grass always looks greener on the other side. I envied him for his apparently carefree lifestyle while he envied my seemingly traditional established one. Ultimately, we both agreed our feud was ridiculous and had nothing to do with our true characters.

Yes, he hooked up with Carson to spite me, and if Carson had been the girl of my dreams, I might have been upset, but I was using her just as she was using me. We both got what we wanted from our relationship. I showed up to her funeral with Gigi on my arm. I told her everything about the night Carson died, the circumstances leading up to it, and our history. I held nothing back. I wanted Gigi to know everything. A part of me needed her to know everything.

A few days later, I decided it was time to talk with my father. I needed to sit down and tell him about the life I wanted. The things that would make me happy. I was intent on manning up and owning my shit. The events of the last year showed me that life is too short to spend it doing anything less than what you love.

The week after I got shot, I returned to Reds to pack up my desk and have lunch with my father. I held nothing back and confessed everything I had buried deep over the years. Every instance where I almost confronted them, the purchase of the cabin, and how with every ounce of my being, I knew one day, with or without Gigi, I would have eventually ended up in the same place. Letting him down and not filling his shoes the way he’d planned for the last twenty-six years of my life was hard.

When I was through getting everything off my chest and laying all my cards on the table, I couldn’t bear to look at him. I didn’t want to see the disappointment in his eyes. My dad was a great father, an amazing husband, and an astute businessman, and for these reasons, I always stayed the course and did what was expected of me, because I didn’t want to let him down.

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