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And he liked it.
“So, you dodged my question earlier,” she said.
“Did I?” he replied. “What was the question?”
She smiled. “About why you wanted to meet in secret like this.”
“Couldnae I just wanted tae spend a wee bit of time with ye?”
“I suppose you could have,” she said. “But, I would hope the thought of spending time with me would not inspire such a grim mood as you had earlier when you asked.”
Fin chuckled. “Nay. Spending time with ye has been the highlight of ma time here.”
Ivy’s cheeks flared with color, and she looked away, biting her bottom lip. He gave her a moment to gather herself. She finally turned back to him, a warm smile stretched from ear to ear.
“I have enjoyed spending time with you as well,” she said, a slight giggle in her voice. “But you are deflecting my question again.”
Fin blew out a long breath and sat back in his chair, taking a long swallow of his drink. He knew he needed to talk to Ivy about what was on his mind. Knew he needed to ask her to do something for him, knew it would be no small cause of consternation and conflict for her. As much as he was dreading the conversation, Fin knew he could not continue to put it off.
“Tis about yer braither,” he said. “And I didnae feel comfortable talkin’ in his keep. Ye never ken who’s lurkin’ about, listenin’ tae things.”
She nodded. “I figured what you had to say was about Castor,” she said. “And given how closely they were all looking at you, I suppose it is not an unreasonable concern. But what is so secret that you could not speak of it?”
Fin gnawed on the inside of his cheek, trying to order his thoughts. He did not want to say the wrong thing and knew that in some ways, he needed to be even more delicate in how he phrased things with Ivy than he had to be with Castor. He did not want to offend her so badly that she would not speak with or see him again. And Fin very much wanted to see her again.
“Ye ken I believe yer braither is behind thae poisonings,” he said, trying to make it sound as gentle as he could.
“Yes, I am aware of that.”
Ivy bristled, and she sat up straighter, her lips compressing into a tight line. He could see the conflict in her eyes and knew she was torn between not wanting to believe her brother could be involved, but not being entirely certain he wasn’t. He was sure she felt pulled in one direction by her loyalty to her family, and in the other by her desire to see justice done for the Duke… but more so, for Gillian.
“Let me ask ye this -- has he done anythin’ tae make ye think he’s involved since ye been back?” Fin asked. “I mean, aside from pullin’ ye out of York all of the sudden like he did.”
Ivy closed in on herself, and Fin could see in her eyes that there was something she was holding back. He could see the conflict raging in her eyes that she was so desperately trying to hold back.
“What is it?” he asked. “Ye can tell me. Tis all right.”
She could not meet his eyes and instead focused on her hands as she dropped them into her lap. The silence stretched out between them, and the longer it did, the more certain Fin became that she was struggling with something that weighed heavily on her heart and soul.
And then Ivy raised her gaze to his and let out a long breath. And then she told him about the conversation she had with her brother shortly after they had returned from York. She told Fin about how strangely he had acted, and how hard he had pressed her about the talks she’d had with him. She told Fin about Castor’s interest in him and how it seemed to her to be something more than simple curiosity.
After she’d finished speaking, she slumped back in her chair, as if getting that out had left her feeling entirely spent. Ivy took a long swallow of her drink and set the goblet back down on the table. She looked up at Fin, her expression gloomy.
“So what did ye think about that?” he asked gently.
“It…” her voice trailed off, and she sighed heavily. “It made me suspicious of my own brother.”
Fin nodded. “That’s nae unreasonable,” he said. “It sounds like strange behavior tae me.”
“But it could be nothing,” she argued. “It could simply be coincidence. Or perhaps we are misunderstanding his motives. It does not necessarily mean Castor is involved.”
“Aye. Tis possible,” Fin replied. “But with everythin’ else, we know combined, it makes me think tis nae coincidence.”
Fin could see that she was struggling mightily inside of herself. She did not want to believe her brother could be involved in something so monstrous, but the questions in her mind were tearing her apart inside. And it made him feel terrible for putting those questions in her head in the first place. The last thing he ever wanted to do was cause her any pain.
Fin gritted his teeth and steeled himself. He had to remind himself of why he had come to York, to begin with. He had been given a specific mission, and it was his duty to see it through. He had to put his own feelings, his own desires aside, to do his duty for Col. No matter how he felt about Ivy, or how she made him feel, he needed to focus on the mission he was given. That was all that mattered.
So why dae I feel so bleedin’ torn up about it?
