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“You said you won’t lie to me, so answer the question!” She raises her voice, impatiently waiting for an answer. I guess I’ve stayed silent for too long. "What do you want?"
"You."
Chapter Ten
Katie
You...the word rings in my head long after I hear it, and I do my best not to faint. Raphael is still looking intently at me, not leaving my gaze for a second without even blinking. I want to laugh into his face, saying that I don't believe a word he says, but that's not true. The more this man speaks, the more something deep down inside of me convinces me that he's telling the truth. And I'm afraid, I'm so scared to believe that it might be true...
"I know you're afraid, Katie," he says as if reading my mind. But why am I surprised? He probably can do that, especially after what I saw he's capable of, "but I'll prove to you that I will never hurt you. I know it will take time, but I'll never give up..."
"Stop it." I interrupt him and close my eyes. Looking at him makes my heart beat with a crazy speed, and I think that maybe if I don't see him, I'll calm down, at least a little. "I'm not someone's property to buy."
"I'm not trying to buy you. I only want us to spend time together to have a chance." I hear his words but do not open my eyes, even though my head starts spinning, and I'm afraid I may fall from the horse. Which doesn't seem as dangerous to me as talking to this man.
"Same thing," I whisper, shaking my head. I feel tears appear again, but I swallow to stop them. "Men like you never pay attention to women like me, Mr. Darrington."
I open my eyes, and before he can say anything, I raise my hand to stop him.
"Please, don't argue with me; we both know it's true," I continue, even though I almost can't breathe, much less speak. "You somehow found out so much about me: my workplace, my home address, my dream job...I guess you're good at playing these games, but I'm not."
I take a deep breath. I see that he desperately wants to say something but is waiting patiently until I finish my thought.
"I'll do anything you paid for, Mr. Darrington: the horse riding, my time, the riding in the forest," I say after a long pause, "because I really need this job, which you are probably already aware of. But do not expect anything else from me, please. That will be all."
When I look into his eyes again, I expect to see disappointment, but all I see is pain written all over his face, as if I’ve somehow hurt him badly, simply by saying this. I'm sure a man like him has plenty of women to choose from, so why is he feeling that? Is it the first rejection of his life? Could that be it?
"Any chance to spend time with you is still a chance, Miss Burton." He finally speaks, and his voice sounds strict, his tone distant.
He's not trying to make me change my mind; he's not pushing any more, and for a second, I already regret saying that, for hurting him this much. But it's now him or me who's gonna get hurt because if I open my heart for him, he'll leave me eventually, so I guess it’s better if it’s him.
"And I won't miss mine, ever," he adds before tapping the horse slightly and riding toward the coral gate.
I follow him to open the gates, but he jumps out of the horse and does that instead of me and then gets back in the saddle even before I manage to reach him.
He's about ten feet away from me now as he leads the horse to the forest. The same forest where he kissed me yesterday. I can't believe I'm going there again, with this man. I promised myself to never see him again, even though I secretly wanted to.
But that was long before he told me that the reason he’s doing all of this is me. And now I feel scared, terror mixed with...pleasure? I have to admit that the thought that a man like him could pay attention to a woman like me brings me satisfaction. It's flattering, even though it’s almost impossible. We read those stories in fairy tales, but it never happens in real life. And I'm not a girl who believes in miracles; I know for sure that they do not exist.
Raphael is so good at riding; he's much better than me. He could've been a coach by himself. I was raised on a farm and have been riding since I was five, but I'm not even close to him. He's so confident, so prepared. It feels like he and the horse speak the same language, as if he has known it for a long time. While I feel tense, not only because it's my first day with this animal, but primarily because of the man I'm riding with.
"Where did you learn to ride like this, Mr. Darrington?" I'm the first to break the silence. I know if I start talking, the day will go by faster.
“I’ve had all my life to learn, Miss Burton," he answers right away and slows down a little for my horse to get closer to his.
“Please call me Katie.”
“In that case, please call me Raphael,” he says right away and faces me. I see a slight smile on his face as if he’s glad that I’ve finally started talking to him.
"I...can't," I mumble, and my voice starts shaking again, just from his smile.
"Then I'll stick with Miss Burton." He turns away and pets the horse’s neck.
"It's different," I try to explain, even though I’m sure that he won't change his mind. "You're a client, while I'm..."
Who am I to him? A coach? A teacher? A girl he kissed once? A girl whose dignity he saved last night?
He probably saved your life...a voice in my head reminds me as if I'm talking with someone else. Yes, he saved my life, while I’ve done nothing but be rude to him.
