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“Oh, way less. Feels like a kitten is licking on this beauty.” He smiles as he stares down at the color on his arm and Silvia and Freddie laugh.
“You’re delusional.” I wince as she makes her way over a particularly sensitive area of my bone, but I try to hold steady.
Leaning my head back on my chair again, I focus on the air coming and going into my lungs. Defaulting to good ole Lamaze breathing I force:In, in, out. In, in, out.I hear Silvia laugh again.
I’m really doing this! I’m getting a tattoo! Me, the mom from the ’burbs.
A sudden surge of adrenaline shoots through my body, and my heart free falls. Waves of excitement wash over me as I realize there’s no going back now. As those needles drive into my skin, I’m flooded with a sense of clarity. Through this pain, I’m seeking beauty. Through a change, I’m being true to myself.
I have no idea how much time has gone by, but I hear the buzzing stop and then, “All done.”
The harsh fluorescent light stings my eyes as I slowly open them to examine my foot. After they adjust, I look at my glossy skin to see a cluster of six beautiful blossoms connected by a vine, each with its own unique markings, each absolutely perfect. The watercolor pinks shine bright against my milky skin and their dark centers dotted with pollen remind me of the real blossoms that welcome spring.
“So…?” Silvia’s prideful smile is wide as she beams down at her work.
Swallowing the lump in my throat, I reply, “Ohh, it’s amazing, Silvia. I love it so much.”
She pumps her fist at the victory, and I giggle.
I look over at Marco and he grins at me. “Looks good on you, you rebel.”
“It does, doesn’t it?” I beam as I study my ink once again...
When Marco’s tattoo is done too, he helps me hobble to the car by supporting me with his good arm and I skip on one foot.
Once we get into the van, I stare at him wide-eyed. “I can’t believe we just did that!”
“Me neither.” He chuckles and then leans over to kiss me softly. “I love you so much, Ellie.”
“I love you too.” I grab both of his cheeks in my hand, and we share a silent moment. “Now let me get a good look at it.” He moves his arm so I can get a better look and I study his plastic-wrapped bicep for a minute. “It’s incredible! Freddie was so detailed, it looks so real.” I yearn to run my fingers over it to touch the individual needles so clearly outlined, but I resist.
Marco chose an armband of varying shades of dark green pine trees; six in total, two larger trees of different heights standing tall on the far sides overlooking four distinct trees sandwiched in between. They’re all overlapped amongst each other but clearly all unique in shape and color. Pine trees represent longevity and peace, and those qualities accurately represent the man they are forever inscribed on.
After we get home with the kids later that afternoon, Marco says, “We have a surprise for you guys.”
We both expose our fresh ink and all four go wild.
“Whoa! That’s so cool!” Camden shouts as he leans in dangerously close to study his dad’s arm.
Marco immediately draws back, and I laugh at his quick recoil. It took getting hit in the balls quite a few times by our little kangaroo before Marco learned to always be agile around him.
“You look like Uncle Joe now, Dad,” Jonathan says.
“Your flowers are so pretty, Momma.” Olivia smiles at me.
“I want those flowers on my foot too!” Lillian hollers.
I’m not sure how I thought these kiddos would react, but I didn’t expect them to be so excited.
I laugh at the fact that now I’m acool mom.
Chapter 22
Regret
Ellie
Ipullintomydriveway after morning drop-off and a quick yoga class, and the garage door is open. Marco is kneeling next to a pile of wood. His saw is out on his workbench.
