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He pushed his chair over so I could see the computer screen and clicked open a file in a folder. I found myself gaping at a screenshot of an article from our town’s local news blog—about me winning the science fair in my senior year of high school. There was a photo of me, with a kind of dorky smile, amid the text.
I hadn’t known Logan had even realized I’d entered the science fair, let alone that I’d won it. He’d certainly never congratulated me.
Logan flipped through more images, one after another, giving me just enough time to take in each one before moving to the next. Some of them were public information, like the award I’d won last year at my old college and a special research project I’d contributed to there that’d gotten written up online. Others were from my private accounts: emails where I shared smaller victories and joys with Mom or Summer, posts he could only have seen because he’d hacked into my account since he’d blocked me on his own.
Every little moment of happiness and success in the past few years of my life, Logan had documented. It was like he’d made a digital scrapbook devoted to me. And I realized from glancing at the file names that I could see the dates when he’d taken the screenshots—and he’d been doing it consistently across those years. This wasn’t something he’d pulled together only recently.
I wasn’t totally sure how to feel about the invasion of privacy, but the sight sent a giddy sort of wobble through my chest anyway. He’d been a total ass to me… but he’d also clearly cared. More than I’d ever let myself hope he could.
Logan was watching my expression. “I’d look through this stuff when the Vigil was struggling with a case or when I was feeling particularly crappy about pushing you away. It seemed like it was the only way I could be with you at all. But you know now. If there’s danger coming, you’re already in its path. So I don’t have to hide how I feel anymore.”
As I gazed back at him, my resolve wavered. For so much of my life, there’d been few things I’d wanted more than Logan Brooks’s adoration, and now he was offering that up to me on a platter. But still…
“You’ve been ahugejerk,” I had to say.
“I have,” he agreed without hesitation. He scooted the chair over so his knees pressed against mine and grasped my hands, holding my gaze even more intently than before. “I’m so sorry for how awful I’ve been since you showed up asking for help with your car, Maddie. The rest of it too, but especially that. I just hope you can understand that it seemed like the lesser of two evils. It’d have been even more awful if you’d gotten hurt.”
A burn of tears formed at the back of my eyes. “It wouldn’t have been your fault if I had, Logan. It’s not your job to protect me. If we’re going to haveanykind of relationship, it has to be as equals, not you being all white knight to my supposed damsel in distress.”
“I get that,” he said dryly, but then his attention dipped briefly to my lips. He slid forward in his chair, tucking his legs right around mine and raising one hand to touch my cheek. My heart hiccupped at his nearness, tingles racing over my skin. “I’m just overjoyed to hear you still think we could have some kind of relationship.”
He leaned in, and my brain short-circuited. I didn’t know how to do anything but bend forward to meet his kiss.
There was something bittersweet about the meeting of our lips. Logan’s mouth molded against mine, demanding and yet coaxing, making me lose my breath, but the knowledge of all our history hung over me. I couldn’t quite lose myself in the heat of the moment, as much as my heart fluttered giddily.
He kissed me harder, teasing his other hand up my arm, and part of me wanted to pull him even closer. I wanted to find out what it could be like with him when he wasn’t fighting our connection the entire time. The hunger seared through me to find out what those hands would feel like all over my body, not just in a hasty hook-up on a bathroom sink.
But he wasn’t the only guy I felt a connection with now. I might have had a crush on Logan forever, but Slade had stolen his way into my heart. And I hadn’t been able to stop thinking about Beckett either.They’dboth treated me like someone worthwhile, someone special, from the start.
I forced myself to pull back. The molten heat in Logan’s eyes nearly did me in. But I held myself in place and forced myself to speak instead of crushing my mouth back against his.
He’d changed his tune on me before. I had to be sure it wouldn’t happen again. And I didn’t even know if I would pick him if I had to choose between the three men who’d captured my interest.
“I don’t know if I’m ready to do this with you,” I said. “Not again. Not after everything. And not just because of that. I like Slade, a lot, and I’m not ditching him just because you finally pulled your head out of your ass. I’ve been getting to know someone else too… I’m not ready to settle down with anyone yet, and I’m definitely not jumping straight into something serious with you.”
Logan’s jaw clenched. He dropped his hands, his fingers curling into fists, but with a deep breath, he managed to relax his stance. “I get it. It’s my own fault for not showing you how much you mattered to me sooner. Slade… Slade’s a good guy.”
I raised my eyebrows, unable to hold back my sarcasm. “You sound so sincere.”
“I mean it,” Logan said. “That doesn’t mean that I’m going tolikethe idea of you being with him instead of me. But…” He motioned to the computer. “What’s mattered the most to me is seeing you happy. If he makes you happy, I shouldn’t get in the way of it. I just hope you’ll give me a chance to keep making up for the past. Since you’re not settling down just yet.” A hint of mischief lit in his eyes.
I couldn’t stop my lips from twitching into a smile. “I guess that’s fair.”
“Good.” He took my hand again, squeezing it gently. “We can take it slow and see how everything works out. And I can promise you this: no matter what happens, I’m never letting you feel like you’re nothing again.”
CHAPTEREIGHT
Madelyn
Iwasn’t totally sure what to make of the fact thatLogancalled me up to ask if I wanted to come check out the seafood market with the Vigil. He didn’t even sound grudging about it when I immediately jumped at the chance. He smiled when I came down to meet the guys at his car, and that smile only tightened a little when Slade slung his arm around my shoulders in a quick embrace before the two of us got into the back seat.
“From the terrific trio to the quintessential quartet,” Slade announced as the other guys got in too, and Logan didn’t argue.
“So, what exactly are we doing at the market?” I asked. “I thought you and Dexter already scoped it out.”
“We stuck to the outside,” Slade said without hesitation. It seemed that Logan had loosened everyone’s lips when it came to the Vigil’s activities.
Dexter nodded. “It’s always best to get the lay of the land before going in for a more intensive mission.”
