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I refused to stay trapped in the past, to let the anger from how things had happened consume me and my future. I had seen where that led a person.
Not just with Lilith.
Troy had let fear of his wolf nearly kill him. Kase’s belief that he would end up like his maker had left him with control held so tight that he couldn’t really live. Grant thought himself a monster, and his self-loathing had torn him apart. And Hunter? He’d let go of most of his past, of who he had been, but the worry that others couldn’t look beyond it had plagued him.
Everyonewas trapped and shaped by the things they experienced. Just because something was over didn’t mean we would let it go. Funny that it wasn’t the event but our holding on to it that really fucked us living creatures over.
Something shifted beside me, a familiar presence I no longer startled from. In the living realm, I couldn’t see it, not fully, just the hint of a shadow, but the way the hair on my arms stood up told me what it was.
A reaper.
My father.
Maybe I should have been more weirded out by his visits—we didn’t speak—couldn’t, I assumed. When I returned to purgatory in my sleep, I spoke to him, but for now? It was just these check-ins. They felt oddly gratifying. When I thought back, I recalled so many times I’d gotten that feeling when I couldn’t identify it, and suddenly all those times I’d thought I was alone, I realized I wasn’t.
That was what life really was, though. It wasn’t about perfection, about fitting in or being right all the time. It was about a lot of fucked-up people doing their best, even when some of those bests really sucked.
I took a deep breath, realizing there was no way I could sit there anymore. Staring at a fire station probably looked weird, and I didn’t need to get put on any lists.
The walk home was long, and by the time I arrived, my feet hurt. Still, it helped clear my head. There was something cathartic about tucking my hands into my pockets and just walking, letting the thoughts drip from me and leaving them behind until my mind was blissfully empty.
When I opened my front door, the lights hit me. I was sure I hadn’t left them on…
The low male voices from inside drew me forward, frowning.What the hell?
As I walked into the living room, the sight stopped me.
Kase and Troy stood near one of the windows, nearly chest to chest, neither looking all that willing to back down from whatever it was that had set them off.
“Locks are foolproof,” Troy said as he pointed at the small piece of metal affixed to the window frame. “They work.”
“Yes, they work for others—notfor Ava,” Kase responded, the condescension in his tone loud and clear. “She needs a proper security system with both technology, such as security cameras, and magic.”
“Magic is useless, and technology? What’s next? Are you going to put in turrets?”
“Perhaps.” The dry way Kase spoke made me wonder if he was serious.
They didn’t look my way, as if they hadn’t noticed me at all while arguing aboutmyhome.
“This is the best thing ever.” Hunter’s voice made me shift to find him leaning forward on my couch, his elbows on his knees, eyes glued to my television.
Well,atelevision, since the one I’d owned had been far smaller than this one. Exactly when had someone replaced it?
And evidently bought a console gaming system, since Hunter had a controller in his hand as he hit the buttons and the character on the screen hacked apart zombies.
“If you like this, justwaituntil I introduce you to Demon Sucker. You play a demon who has to possess humans and cause mayhem until you rack up enough bad karma to draw angels down to earth,” Grant told him, sitting beside him with a controller of his own.
Hunter turned to face the mage, eyes wide as if he’d heard nothing more exciting than that in his entire life.
“What are you doing here?” I asked finally, when the situation couldn’t get any weirder.
No, don’t say that. You’ll just tempt the universe into proving you wrong.
All four men turned their gazes my way, sharing a look that said the same thing—What do you mean, you idiot?
I grabbed my phone from my pocket and held it up like a visual aid. “I set you a text message.”
“Yes, you did,” Kase said impassively. “And I ignored it.”
