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“The crowd dispersed quickly,” Kieran said, explaining their appearance. Was that a good or bad thing?
“He’s right,” Kallan said, ignoring him and focusing on Claire. “As Fae, our magic is tied to our emotions so much more than a witch or wizard’s is. Especially when you have the Energy reading ability as well. You have impressive control over your magic actually.”
“Then why does it keep hurting people,” Claire said, not able to meet his eyes.
“You aren’t hurting us,” Malcolm growled. “You’re protecting us.”
“And you forget that we are more than capable of protecting ourselves,” Desmond gestured. He tried to hide it but Claire could feel his hurt down their bond. “You need to trust us to take care of ourselves.”
Holly squeezed her hand, probably feeling the hurt pouring off Desmond and Claire’s emotions churning in her gut. “Claire,” she said softly. “I can feel your fear, so I won’t discount it. I won’t tell you that you won’t lose any one of us. No one here knows the future.”
“However, Cody and Desmond are right. We are all more than capable of taking care of ourselves. And we chose this. We chose you and the vision of how you see the Realm. More importantly, each one of us would gladly die protecting you.”
Claire stared at her in horror. “That’s the exact opposite of what I want.”
Holly’s eyebrows arched. “Would you dishonor us by taking away our choice?”
“No… but…” Claire’s eyes burned as all of the grief she had been suppressing seemed to come bubbling up. “I already lost one family before I ever knew them,” she rasped out.
Holly’s eyes filled with warmth and understanding. “Oh, Claire. You’ll never lose us, not permanently. We will always be here.” She placed a hand on Claire’s heart. “Just like your parents are. They both gave their lives for you. Don’t dishonor their choice or our choice by keeping secrets from us now.”
Claire thought about the other secret she was keeping, her mother’s warning about using her magic before her birthday. If she used too much, too soon… she could risk everything. This would be the perfect time to bring it up but she couldn’t seem to open her mouth.
Everett stepped up behind her and gently placed his hands on her shoulders, waiting for her to pull away. “Family isn’t just something to protect,” he said softly. “It’s also something to rely on.”
His words combined with Holly’s struck a chord deep in Claire, as if her very magic sensed the truth behind his words. She looked around the room at the people she held most dear in this life. He was right. She hadn’t been relying on them. And she had hurt them by doing that. The very thing she had been trying to avoid doing, she had done by not trusting them.
“Your magic reacts to your emotions but it also reacts to your intent,” Zack said softly. “If your intent is to protect your family it will protect them but your fear will cause it to become chaotic and out of control.”
“You are also viewing your magic as separate from yourself,” Kallan reminded her of the words he spoke earlier in the week about her magic. “You are your magic and your magic is you. It is an extension of yourself. You control it when you trust it and trust your intentions.”
Claire bit her lip. Was it really that easy? Could she trust herself and her magic? It felt too easy but clearly the way Claire had been doing it wasn’t working anymore. In her effort to control her magic she lost control of it as she separated herself from it. She viewed it more as a wild animal, like a Felua, than a part of herself. If her magic was truly tied to her intention and her intention was to protect her family, she had to decide if she could trust herself to handle any situation that they faced.
As if reading her thoughts, Holly squeezed her hand. “We trust you to do whatever keeps us safe but trust us to do the same.”
Claire took a deep breath and slowly nodded. “I’m sorry,” she said. “You are right. I’ve been so scared to lose any of you.” She bit her lip and looked away as the lump in her throat got bigger. She swallowed it down. “Ever since we started on this journey and I’ve learned the cost it took to get here, I’ve been so fixated on that, that I’ve lost sight of the bigger picture.”
She looked at Everett and smiled softly as she repeated his words. “Family isn’t just something to protect, it's something to rely on.”
She looked at her sensitive wizard next.I’m sorry, she said to him down their bond.
Desmond smiled at her,It’s okay.
She looked at Malcolm yet, who stood with his arms crossed and gave her a gruff smile. “You have the heart of a dragon, little treasure. I should have seen this coming with that.”
Claire shook her head. “It’s my fault. I thought I could handle all of it.”
“You don’t have to,” Bethany said bluntly. “So let us help.”
Claire laughed as Holly rolled her eyes and she opened her arms to Bethany who winked and gave her a quick hug and pulled Holly in for a group hug. Zack and Cody gave her hugs as well before Claire let herself be enveloped by her Triad. She felt a million pounds lighter now and her magic never felt more settled in her center.
“So why are you back early again?” Cody asked the twins who hovered awkwardly in the door.
“The crowds dispersed quickly after you left,” Kieran said looking at Kallan. “No one seemed interested in talking until they heard the Elders’ decision. It’s up to the Elders now.”
A pang of fear flashed across Claire’s stomach and she intentionally took a deep breath. Whatever came their way, she would be able to handle it with her family.
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