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“It’s all right,” she said good-naturedly. “I’m sure we’ll figure it out. I am not exactly an expert hostess, but we can learn, can’t we?”
“It’s not just the house, the estate itself is abandoned, the tenants’ houses are in bad conditions. You’ll see why I was desperate to marry when you get there. There’s a lot of work to be done.”
She nodded mutely.
“Anyway, you should get a good night’s rest. The journey won’t be as trying tomorrow, but I imagine it won’t be easy for you to settle into the house.”
“You won’t be sharing my room tonight, then?” She didn’t look up at him as she asked, just poked at the chicken with her fork.
“No.” His voice sounded strangled to his own ears. “You need your rest, and so do I. I don’t think either of us would get that if I stayed with you.”
She nodded again. Her lips were drawn in her thoughtful pout that he knew so well. He wanted to smile at the gesture and then kiss that pout off of her mouth.
His eyes dropped to her low bodice, the swell of her breasts rising and falling with every breath. At that moment, he wanted to curse his resolve not to go to her tonight. To hell with it, she was his wife. He had a right to her. But he didn’t want her first time to involve stained linens in a cheap creaky inn. He was starved and rough. He wasn’t sure he would be able to restrain himself enough not to hurt her. So the least he could do for her was provide a comfortable bed.
John forced his eyes to remain on his plate until supper was over. After that, his wife went to her bed, and he stayed at the bar, drinking ale until he was too tired to think about anything. He paid for the meal and drinks, went to his room, plopped a blanket on the floor, and settled next to his bed until he fell into a fitful dreaming state.
