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Chapter 14
Jo dashed into her room, closed the door, and leaned her back against it. Tears rolled down her cheeks as a sob tore out of her lungs.
How could I be so foolish?
She ripped the earrings off her ears, walked toward her vanity, and threw them into her jewelry box. She looked up at the looking glass and stared into her reflection. She had been so happy just a few hours ago, so confident in herself and her future.
So in love.
“Ugh!” She spun away from the looking glass and fell onto her bed, loudly sobbing out her pain.
The door opened and closed behind her, but she didn’t even turn around. Quiet steps approached the bed, and then the mattress dipped and a soft palm pressed against her spine.
“What happened, dear?” Selena asked her.
Jo shook her head. “He ended it!” she screamed into the coverlet, her voice muffled. Jo didn’t know if Selena understood her muffled words, but she didn’t ask Jo to repeat herself.
Jo rolled to her side, a strand of hair falling out of her coiffure and covering half her face.
“I want to leave,” she said as she swiped away the errant lock of hair. “I don’t want to stay here anymore.”
Selena smiled sadly. “What was it you said to me when I wanted to leave before? Don’t let him win.”
“I don’t care,” Jo muttered as she looked down on the coverlet spotted in two places by her tears. She swallowed. “I thought I was in love with him, Selena. For the second time in my entire life, I fell in love again. Well, they both proved me a fool, didn’t they?”
“You are not a fool for falling in love,” Selena said vehemently. “You are a woman. And those poor excuses for gentlemen do not deserve your tears.”
Jo sat up and embraced Selena in a hug. They sat like that, finding strength in each other and not talking. They both had thought they found something special during this house party. And they both were very wrong.
“What exactly did he tell you?” Selena finally asked as Jo’s breathing evened out.
Jo eased herself away from her friend and grimaced. She didn’t want to remember it. It was painful and humiliating. “He said that he doesn’t get emotionally involved. And that he should have ended our affair before I started having feelings for him.”
Selena’s mouth opened, and her face was a grimace of confusion. “Does he actually want you to believe that he wasn’t emotionally involved? Because I’ve seen the way he looks at you when he thinks no one is looking and—”
“Please, Selena,” Jo begged as her heart leaped against her ribcage. “Please, don’t give me false hope. He told me he has no feelings for me and that he wants me to leave. I shan’t look for a deeper meaning than that.”
Selena nodded. “Very well. But you’re not leaving. We shall not let a couple of boorish men drive us away. You shall wear your finest gown and stretch a smile onto your lips as you flirt with all the other gentlemen of the house party right before his eyes. Because if he truly doesn’t care for you, you shouldn’t care what he thinks either.”
Jo grimaced. She didn’t want to play this game anymore. She didn’t want to pretend and flirt with others while watching Richard do the same. But the house party would end in two days anyway. It would take her a day to collect her belongings and say her goodbyes. She couldn’t just leave without a word.
Besides, she was going to spend tomorrow with Millicent. She had promised Lady Vane she would occupy Millie’s time now that her favorite aunts had left for the funeral. She couldn’t just rush away in the middle of the night like a coward because the infuriating viscount had told her to.
Because he had broken her heart.
It wasn’t his house party. And Lady Vane would not forgive Jo for leaving without a word.
Jo would just have to harden her heart and avoid the viscount until the end of the party. She would collect her belongings, arrange for the vehicle, and leave right after the closing ball of the party.
Jo took her nightly ablutions and then she and Selena climbed into bed and shared stories of their past loves and laughed at the instances when they thought that the sky was falling and the end was nigh just because a gentleman didn’t return their love.
Jo started feeling gradually better.
This too shall pass.
She was glad to have Selena by her side this time. The last time she’d had no one, and the situation was ten times worse. She wouldn’t let Richard and his thoughtless actions defeat her. She would cry into her pillow for a few more days, of course. The heart didn’t heal so easily.
Perhaps she would be in a melancholy mood for a few weeks. And looking out into the crowd as she performed, she would be seeing his face everywhere, thinking of the days they’d spent together, but eventually, the pain would cease.
