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“Bevilën,” he whispered before he drifted off to sleep, and it made everything in me giddy.
I’d never loved anyone as much as I loved him.
It was so odd to me. Caring about someone like this. To the point, I was now watching Gale as he slept—his bare chest rising and falling as he breathed in and out gently, the worry on his face finally gone. Knowing he was at ease made me feel better.
My mind was heavy with so much.
Like the fact that I was a freaking queen now.
But seeing him, loving him, making love to him…made me feel better. He made me want to write love songs…and I was not a love song type of person. I was all about the heartbreak, the pain that loved caused. But now, when I looked back on my music, I couldn’t imagine singing those songs with the same agony again. He took it all out of me. If I couldn’t recognize myself, my fans surely wouldn’t be able to, either.
I smiled at the thought of them getting a sappy love album from me. But that smile slowly faded when I realized my days as a singer were on hold indefinitely because again, I was Queen. His queen.
It was crazy.
Me.
Little old me was now a queen to millions of people.
I didn’t have time for an album.
I barely had time for a honeymoon.
It was our first night. We only had a few more hours before we had to get up to go to the memorial service for Prince Arthur and stand for the royal salute in his honor by the armed services. The palace, the monarchy, had no days off, not even after a wedding. We had until the end of the week before our honeymoon would mostly be a publicity tour throughout the country so everyone could meet the new king and queen.
And the thought of all that was to come terrified me more now than ever because it was no longer in the distant future; it was the present.
I glanced over at the clock on the bedside table next to him, amazed because Queen Elspeth had warned me about this feeling and his… She’d damned well predicted everything.
—24 Hours Earlier—
I stood in the finest white silk robe I’d ever worn in my life, my hair and makeup finally finished. All that was left for me to do was wear the dress. The room was filled with six dressing assistants, plus the head seamstress just in case. Everyone waiting was silent, almost more anxious than I was, waiting for me to say start. Gelula stood by the side of the mirror with a calm smile on her face, nodding to me. I knew we had to get on with it. The world was waiting. But I couldn’t look away from the wedding dress, my wedding dress. I’d seen sketches, I’d picked the fabric, I had gone for a dozen and one fittings; I knew all the dress details, too. It was a fitted ball gown, with 300 hand-cut Chantilly lace roses, six-carat white diamonds, and other gems embellished on hand-stitched zari embroidery, and to top off the magnificence, a fifteen-foot-train.
How did it get to this?
I remembered the first time I had worn it, and my mom’s eyes watered. She was not a crier, so to see her like that made me tear up even more.
I didn’t know what was wrong with me now.
Maybe it was because this was the real deal. The real show.
Oh, God.
“Having cold feet?”
Spinning on my heels, I turned to see Queen Elspeth already dressed in a rich-purple A-line gown, with capped sleeves, not a single red hair out of place.
“Forgive me, Your Grace.” I curtsied to her, head bowed.
“Just like that, your very last curtsy to me, and it is excellent.”
At that, I looked back up at her, eyes wide because I hadn’t even thought about that.
She smiled, nodding. “The next time we see each other, it shall be I who curtsies to you.”
I had no words. All I could do was stare at her.
How long had she been Queen? Over thirty years, watching over this family, this kingdom, and just like that, she was supposed to move over for me? I barely knew anything. In fact, compared to her, I knew nothing at all. I was a baby.
