AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“He was always kind to me,” I add on, signing the best I can as I do so, then look at Dusk and Onyx, wondering if what we’re saying is okay.
Onyx signs, and Dusk says his words aloud. “He was a hero in this life. And he will be a hero in the next.”
They both bow their heads, so Rayne and I do too. Then, after a moment, they stand taller, staring out around themselves. Onyx looks defeated, but Dusk looks on the edge of losing all control. I don’t blame them. I didn’t know all these people, and I feel crushed looking at the depressing sight before me. What they’re feeling… it’s unimaginable.
Yes, I’d lost Rayne, at least for a while, and had never thought a pain could be worse. But pain is not a competition. It’s different for every person, as is grief. And they’re definitely in pain and grieving right now.
Beside me, Dusk’s shoulders start to tremble. “We can’t keep doing this. We can’t keep burying people.” He shakes his head, but he’s signing for Onyx as he takes a shuddered breath and continues. “We’re all going to end up dead, so what’s the point?”
The sky is darkening, casting everything in grey as evening approaches. There isn’t even the brightness of a sunset to chase away the sadness of this moment.
So, I try to be that light for them. “As my father used to say, life is a series of valleys and hills. Right now we’re in a valley, but one day we’ll be at the top of the hill and things will be better.”
“I hope so,” Onyx signs to me, but Dusk just shakes his head.
Moving to my big warrior, I take Dusk’s face in my hand and force him to look at me. “We’ll get Phantom back. We’ll fix all of this. There’s a way, I know it.”
His gaze holds mine and he leans forward and presses a light kiss onto my lips. But I think he’s more trying to get me to drop this than because he feels better, which hurts. Still, I release him and glance at the grave one more time, trying to dig deep and hold onto my sense of hope. For me, as well as, for these men who desperately need me.
Rayne places his hand at the small of my back, and then we all make our way back to the cave. There, they build up the fire once more, and start a soup over the flames of mostly things they’d collected while we walked. It’s the same thing we’ve had many, many times now, but I’m still looking forward to it. All this work with so little food is hard at times.
“They shouldn’t be back tonight,” Rayne says, and he’s probably right. It takes the Shadow King a great deal of his energy to protect his creatures in this world because it’s too light, and so when he sends over a lot of them, like he did last night, we’re usually safe for a day or two.
We hope, at least.
It takes all the strength we have to journey to the river nearby and bathe, change our clothes, and tend to the guys’ wounds from the battle. By then, night has fully fallen and the soup is ready, so we all sit in the safety of the cave, our light and smoke mostly hidden by the leafy branches we place over the entrance. Inside, the fire chases away the chill of the night and we gather around the fire and eat our soup in silence. Again, the flavor… mostly of mushrooms and herbs, some carrots and onions, isn’t much, but I almost want to cry when it hits my stomach and I feel full for the first time all day.
Not much hunting has gotten done since Phantom was taken from us.
“Should we talk about the elephant in the room?” Rayne asks, ruffling his short, light brown hair awkwardly.
Onyx and Dusk frown, exchanging a glance, then looking at me. I actually smile. They probably have no idea what an elephant is. “He means we should talk about what the elder said,” I explain, while trying to sign the words.
They nod but won’t look at me or Rayne.
I understand. The Shadow King has an army and they’re killing us. Literally. There’s a fucking graveyard that proves it. But what the elder said… how can we possibly do that? How can we possibly ask Rayne to risk his life for all of us?
“He said there was only one way–” Rayne begins.
“But there could be others that we haven’t figured out yet,” I tell him without thinking.
Dusk stares at his hands as he answers me. “And you think we have time to waste?”
I feel sick. Of course, I know we’re running out of time. Of course, I know that the fate of both of our worlds rests on defeating the Shadow King, his beasts, and fixing things with Phantom, but that doesn’t change the way I feel.
Rayne sighs, and his light blue eyes meet mine. “I have to do this, Ann. The elder said…”
I shake my head because I just can’t lose him again. “No, Rayne.”
When Rayne died, a part of me died too. And when his ghost found a new body, and he and my shadow beasts accepted each other, I felt like I could handle anything life threw at me as long as I had them. This was love. This was the family I always needed.
I can’t lose him again.
But I can’t give up on Phantom either.
“The elder said if I don’t go into the Shadow King, then you’ll lose all of us.” Rayne is the only one who can take over the king’s body, and I know it, but I can’t trade one of my men for another. Not Rayne. Not Dusk. Not Onyx. None of them. We have to find a different way to get the king to take the shard out of Phantom.
I glance at Onyx, and slowly he begins to sign, “I wish I could do this. I wish it wasn’t up to Rayne. But he is a warrior, and I will not take away his right to decide for himself what he’ll do.”
