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"Then from who?" Irila asked.
"From Nari," I realized.
Zeal nodded. "My overbearing, impulsive asshole of a brother touched her soul. He calls to the ambition inside her, and she's too perfect. She's too willing. He was supposed to wait before pushing her, but he's tired of the silence. They all are, since I'm the only one whose priests can hear him now."
"Any advice for what to do with Ela?" I asked.
Zeal chuckled. "Let him go. Everyone is so sure he's out of control, but I promise he's not. He needs to learn to let it go. He needs to accept that he's the darkness, and she's the light. People are always scared of the first, but it's the second that burns them. He's fine, Talin. He just needs to accept that, and he won't if you're always trying to hold him back."
"I'm not," I promised.
Zeal lifted a brow. "Aren't you? You feel that pull, but you've been ignoring it. Why?"
"Because Nari's needed us," I countered.
"Mhm," Zeal said, those iridescent eyes holding mine. "She does, as more than simply her toy soldiers."
It felt like a slap upside the head. He was all but saying that she needed our love. She also needed us to love each other, and we'd been resisting that. Since we'd moved in together, we'd naturally put her in the center. I was sure she loved it, but it also meant that Ela and I had been ignoring each other.
We were friends, sure, but our kisses were always in passing. Our touches had become fleeting. For a moment, we'd grown so close, and then the winter break had happened. Nari and I had gotten our first chance to truly be alone together. Ela had found his darkness, dragging Wraythe into it with him. We'd allowed those minor little things to pull us apart, and we'd convinced ourselves that it was ok because we were all here for her.
So when we headed back to our room that night, I was still thinking about it. I also had a test in the morning, which meant I should be studying. My eyes scanned the same page over and over, but it didn't matter. My mind was on what Zeal had said. He'd called us her "toy soldiers." I was pretty sure we weren't meant to be toys, but it felt like he was saying something important with that phrase.
Was it because we were being too good as students? We'd all been trying to obey the rules, to minimize the chances that someone would call Nari out for anything. Before the winter break, that hadn't been our way. In truth, so much had changed with that one week apart. She'd fallen in love with me. Ela had fallen into another bed. I'd figured out that I missed Wraythe when we were gone. And Wraythe had realized that he had nothing to be ashamed of. Well, at least that was what it seemed like.
When it got late, Nari headed in for her shower. Wraythe followed behind her. The water eventually turned off, and I heard the sounds of those two talking softly in bed, but I really needed to finish this chapter. I tried to read the page again, but my mind kept jumping.
And then a cup clinked as Ela set it on the table beside me. "Boring subject?" he asked.
I closed the book and dropped it beside the tea. "Busy brain." Then I moved my legs in an invitation for him to sit.
He did. "What's wrong, Talin?"
"Zeal called us toy soldiers."
"And?" He shook his head, proving that meant absolutely nothing to him.
"He said it like a bad thing, but his tone felt important. Like it was one of his hints. Those things he says that are so obvious to him, but fly right over our heads." I reached for my cup and took a sip, impressed that he'd made the tea exactly how I liked it. "You trying to give them a moment alone?"
He shook his head. "No, there's a crease right here..." He leaned in and traced a line on my brow. "I'm just hoping it's not because of me."
Again, I put the cup down, and then I caught his hand. It only took a little pressure to pull him closer. "Partly because of you, but not in the way you think."
"What way?" he asked, shifting with me until he lay across my chest on the couch.
"You used to come visit me in my room," I said, my voice softer. "I miss that. Since we've moved in, I'm not sure where things stand between us anymore."
He started to pull away, but I wrapped my arms around his back, holding him against me. That made him stop pulling, but Ela didn't quite give in. Instead, he lifted those dark eyes to meet mine, and shifted to brace his hand against the arm of the couch that I was now leaning against.
"You liked me when I was a pretty and innocent little thing," he said, his voice completely emotionless, but his eyes held mine like a dare, challenging me to deny it.
"Yes, and I like you more as a dangerous and sensual man," I countered. "Or did you forget that the first time we met, you grabbed me by the ring and dropped me almost to my knees?" Catching his shirt, I pulled him a little closer. "I'm not a submissive, Ela, but I do like a little pain. I love to be pushed around by a man who can do it. I handled the ring better than Wraythe because I don'tcareif it hurts."
I watched his pupils flare, and he bent his arm just enough to bring his face closer to mine. "I don't know how to stop."
"You do," I promised. "Otherwise, I'd be in a world of hurt right now."
Then I hooked a leg behind his knee and lifted my hips into him. I was sure he could feel the ridge of my half-hard dick. The curl of his lips proved it, so I did it again. Above me, Ela's eyes slipped closed, and then he bucked against me once.
