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Chapter Fifty Six
Bray
Why am I never enough?
First my mum, then my dad. The only people who have ever accepted me and loved me for me are Cyrus, Asher... and Blair—or so I thought. I told her I love her, and I meant it. She’s my whole world, my everything, and now she’s gone. Worse, she thinks I betrayed her, thinks I cheated and hurt her like everyone else.
I watch her drive away as my family crumbles. I want to chase her, make her understand and figure out what happened. I know who sent it, but where is that photo from? All I can do, though, is kneel here with Asher’s hand on mine and think... I did it again.
I ruined another great thing, and now Blair will never trust another man again. Why would she? All she has ever had from them is pain and betrayal. I did the same things they did, so I have to let her go, even if it kills me and breaks our family apart. She deserves better. She deserves to be happy.
Even if it’s not with me.
“Bray,” Asher whispers.
“I’m sorry,” I rasp, dropping my gaze to the perfectly tiled entryway. “I’m so sorry. I swear I didn’t—”
“Shh,” he murmurs, holding me as Cyrus storms past us. We both turn to watch him go, and not two minutes later, we hear the sounds of thudding fists and screaming rock music and smell the weed and booze. He’ll take this harder than anyone.
“We need her back, or we are going to fall apart,” Asher says, and I flinch. “It’s not your fault, Bray. Didn’t you see? She was looking for any excuse to run. She’s scared and worried that what happened to Meredith will happen to us. This wasn’t about you or even us, it was about her. Her old fears have taken over, and we can’t fight them, only she can.”
“I told her I love her,” I admit.
“Bray.” Asher kneels in front of me, his eyes filled with tears that make the light blue orbs glassy. “We all love her; you were just brave enough to tell her when she needed it most. She will know what we all feel is true, that she isn’t alone, and once she has slayed her demons, she will be back, and we’ll be waiting. But until then, we have to keep this family together—for her.” His gaze goes to the stairs where we can hear Cyrus.
“What if she doesn’t come back?”
“She will,” he assures me, his voice strong, adamant. “I saw into her soul. She wants to be loved. She wants to be happy. She wants to be Crew. This is just a defence mechanism.”
“But her stalker, this is what he wanted,” I say worriedly, looking back at the road. I could still catch up with her.
“You’re right, so we need to find him first. Come on, let’s go beat the shit out of Cyrus until he can think clearly.” He stands, offering me his hand, and I take it, needing to lean on my brother right now. But he’s right, he always is.
She will be back, and we will be waiting with open arms.
* * *
Asher
Everything I told Bray is true, though I didn’t tell him how much I’m hurting, how angry and worried I am. I can’t. Bray is sensitive in a way no one but us and Blair understands. He feels so deeply, and that’s why he keeps his heart locked away. That’s why he searches for the love he should have received from the one woman in his life—his mother—in every passing woman.
If Blair isn’t careful, she will break Bray and Cyrus beyond repair. Many have tried, but she is succeeding because we gave her that power. We let her into our lives, hearts, and family. She trusted us, now it’s time for me to have a little faith and trust in the woman I fell in love with too.
I have to believe she’s coming back, or I’ll be like Bray, sobbing like a kicked dog at the door, or worse, like Cyrus, destroying everything in my path to block out the emotional pain with physical pain. My brothers need me right now, so that’s what I’ll do. I’ll be the voice of reason. I’ll be the one who keeps us together for her. I’ll save this family with blood, sweat, and fucking tears.
This isn’t the end of Crew, it’s just a new beginning.
I won’t let Blair go, not like my mother. I won’t spend the rest of my life wondering if she’s okay, if she thinks of me. I won’t live surrounded by what-ifs anymore. I’m all the way in with Blair until the bitter end, and I refuse to let her go. I refuse to give up on her like everyone else did.
I made a promise to her that night she slept in my arms, when I took her fears and past as my own, that I would never leave her. I vowed that she would never be alone again, and I meant it.
She’s ours, even if she doesn’t want to be right now.
* * *
Cyrus
Who am I if I can’t protect my family? That’s the only way I know how to show them I love them. I can’t speak the words like Bray or Asher. All I have are my fists and the willingness to sacrifice my life for theirs. But that won’t fix this. I can’t even hold myself together enough to go check on my brothers. My fury and pain flow out of me until I want to kill someone, to chase her down and drag her back and tie her to my bed so she can never leave us again.
