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“Things are better now. I haven’t seen the man since, not that I’d know if I did.”
Julian’s hands held mine just a little tighter, and he sucked in a breath.
“If anyone ever threatens you again, tell me.”
“Thank you,” I whispered. “Not just for saving me that night, but for offering to do it again.”
Julian let out a small chuckle, and the sound was beautiful to me. It made my heart beat faster and my palms sweat a little.
“You’ve had enough hurt in your life, Evelyn.”
When he said my name, I felt my breath catch in my lungs, and boldness took me over.
“Then why won’t you let me get closer to you?” I muttered.
It sounded almost whiny, and I knew that, but I couldn’t help it.
“You know why,” Julian answered.
Even though he said that, he looked up, his hand sliding across my cheek. The warmth radiated from that one spot, and I felt a furnace in my heart begin to burn away the sadness that had caged it for so long.
“She won’t understand,” Julian said, but his hand stayed on my cheek, his lips only inches from mine.
“I can’t risk losing her, too,” I said, even as I moved minutely closer.
“I’m not sure I can stay away from you any longer, though,” Julian said.
I saw in his eyes that he was about to close the gap between us, and I was sure I’d never wanted anything more in my life.
He moved, and something clattered.
His elbow had knocked over his mug of hot chocolate, spilling it over the white granite countertops. We jumped back from each other, and I moved back to the seat I had been in originally.
“W-we can’t do anything,” I said shakily, “It would be unfair to Hannah.”
“Agreed, um, I’m sorry for being rude to you before,” Julian answered.
He looked shakier than I’d ever seen him, his face flushed and eyes startled. He pulled out a roll of paper towels from under the counter and cleaned up the mess. Before I could gather my thoughts to say anything else, he was gone.
Just in time, too, because moments later, I heard Hannah walk in, singing at the top of her lungs. When she entered the kitchen, smiling broadly, I was staring into my mug of hot chocolate and contemplating how unfair the universe was.
Chapter Seven
Evelyn
Idecided to stay overnight, and things were completely different with Julian.
I wouldn’t say he acted less cold to me with Hannah around, but I was able to deal with it better, because I was beginning to realize that maybe, just maybe, my feelings weren’t completely one-sided. It didn’t make me any happier, but just more impervious to Julian’s attitude.
“Are yousureyou’re okay?” Hannah asked for the millionth time.
“Yes, Hannah, I’msure.”
The truth was, I didn’t know. I had never had intense feelings for anyone before, and this was totally new to me. We were in the viewing room, with a giant bowl of popcorn between us. I hadn’t touched the stuff, which granted, was unusual for me, and I was hardly paying attention to the movie on the screen. It was some brand newMarvelfilm that Hannah was super excited about, and I had been eager to see. Instead of watching superheroes fly around the screen though, I just stared straight ahead with an unfocused gaze, wondering why thefuckI had to have feelings for probably the worst man in New York.
I had tried, reallytriedto find some other guy attractive, even made out with Mike again a few times. When I turned him down for a date though, Mike had looked crestfallen. It made me feel bad, and with my best friend right beside me, I felt even worse that I was considering my feelings for her father. I knew she would never let us be together. Hannah had a rocky relationship with her father. Apparently, he had spent more time working than with her when she was a kid, and I got that. Being left behind like a bad taste in someone’s mouth was never fun. Just because his poison had been work didn’t mean it hurt less. I had seen pictures of her mother, Ruth, and also knew that Hannah was the spitting image of her. It must have been hard for her father to see that every day. On the other hand, I had seen the protective way Julian looked after Hannah and knew he’d never let anything hurt her. He watched over her like some stubborn angel, too scared to get close, but also too scared to stray too far.
I couldn’t get in between whatever their dynamic was. I could easily ruin everything.
