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Of all the times for Shade to be observant...I sighed. “I encountered Darius yesterday.”
Her entire manner lit up, but her smile faded almost the moment it appeared. “Then why are you frowning? I thought such a meeting would make you happy; I know you two miss one another.”
My heavy heart lifted. “He misses me?”
She nodded as she hopped lightly over a log with surprising grace. “He often mentions you, talking about all that he misses, small details, really—the way your eyes light up when you smile, the way your forehead puckers when you concentrate on your weaving, your fierce stubbornness that he seems both fond of and exasperated by, the lovely sound of your voice...”
I embraced her words and allowed myself to recall the countless things that I missed about him in return—his crooked smiles that caused my heart to lift, the warm sound of his laughter, his intoxicating caramel-apple scent, how his green eyes lit up with his unwavering confidence, the way he’d peer over the top of his book of legends to watch me as I wove, how he’d frequently used his weaving mirror to examine his reflection, that kiss...
I tried to stop myself from remembering that kiss—how tender, wonderful, and dreamlike it had been—but I thought of it anyway...until Shade’s next comment interrupted my favorite memory.
“I told him how much you miss him.”
I froze as horror seized me. “You didwhat?”
As usual my anger was lost on her. She smiled. “Your stubborn insistence on not talking to one another is growing ridiculous, for that’s not the way to repair friendships.” Her look was rather scolding. “But not to worry, he didn’t react poorly; I haven’t seen him look so happy in ages. He wanted me to tell you that his misses you, too.”
For a moment I felt as if I’d swallowed the sun...before the ever-present darkness within me smothered it once more. This conversation between Darius and Shade had obviously occurredbeforeour encounter yesterday. His words once more invaded my mind, haunting and relentless: “Perhaps I was wrong to have faith in you.”
She blinked at me. “Oh dear, you’re frowning again. What’s wrong?”
I didn’t have the words to tell her why, but I found myself wanting to confide in her all the same; the pain festering within me was too difficult a burden to bear on my own. “I wish I could turn back time and change the course I’ve taken, but it’s too late.”
She pursed her lips thoughtfully. “I don’t see why. If you don’t like the destination you’re heading towards, just turn around and take another path.”
I sighed. “Unfortunately, that’s not how it works.”
Her forehead puckered. “Why not?”
Her innocent inquiry caused me to pause. Could it be so simple? But even if Icouldtake another path, nothing could erase the consequences that my journey up to this point had caused—hurting countless Weavers with my thefts, losing my friends, being suspended from the only place I’d felt truly at home, and pushing Darius away...especiallyhim.
After yesterday I feared I’d broken what we’d shared completely. His faith had wavered, just as mine had previously done towards him. But while I now realized the error of my judgement, he had no reason to change his, not when he was right to doubt me after all I’d done to him.
We reached the border dividing the Nightmare Realm’s portion of the forest with the Dream Realm’s. The contrast was like night and day; rather than bare, twisted branches, the Dream Realm’s trees were full of vibrant blossoms of cheerful colors that emanated sweet perfume. The sunshine I hadn’t seen in so long shone through the canopy of leaves to dance in golden pools across the foliage.
Longings for my old home of vibrancy and light flickered to life inside me, impossible to suppress now that I’d experienced it again. Darius clearly wasn’t the only thing I missed.
Shade glanced around before pointing to lovely blooms growing nearby, bursting with color and life. “Those flowers look intriguing. Should we start there?” She pattered over, and after careful examination, she plucked a few petals from a violet dahlia.
“How do you know that ingredient will help you create a sense of hope?” I asked.
She shrugged. “I’m not entirely sure. But they’re pretty and smell lovely, which has to count for something.”
My lips twitched. Life for Shade was so simple. If only my own could to be similar.
I settled at the base of a towering tree bursting with roses and watched as Shade foraged through the flora before I quickly became distracted by my surroundings, so lovely and tranquil. The air was different here, peaceful, and the light filled my starved soul. I felt like a flower who’d been out of the sun too long who was finally allowed to bloom once more.
I closed my eyes and allowed these feelings to fill me—the peace, the sense of belonging, the absence of fear. What I wouldn’t give to remain here forever.
At the sound of Shade’s soft footsteps, I opened my eyes to find her standing over me holding a glass vial, which swirled with glistening, smoking liquid. Midst my distraction she’d already managed to create a sample brew.
She held out her potion. “You should be the first to taste it.”
I gaped at her. “Me?”
“Of course. Though you said very little when I inquired after you, your eyes couldn’t keep the secrets you seem determined to protect: you’re in great need of some hope.”
With all that had led me to this point and what had recently transpired with Darius...I sighed. “I fear no hope can be found in my situation.”
